Tag Archives: US

Reverend told by homophobes that his late husband has gone to hell

Reverend told by homophobes that his late husband has gone to hell

Rev. Richard Coles (Photo: Tiwtter)
Rev. Richard Coles (Photo: Tiwtter)

Few of us wish to contemplate the pain of losing a partner. How much worse to then receive messages from so-called Christians informing you that they’re pleased your other half had died and that he’s now residing in hell.

That’s the situation that a reverend with the Church of England finds himself in this week, following the death of his civil partner.

Rev. Richard Coles, 57, has celebrity status in the UK. In the 1980s, as a musician, he teamed up with singer Jimmy Somerville to form the band The Communards and enjoyed a number one hit single with a cover of “Don’t Leave Me This Way” in 1986 (it reached 40 in the Billboard Hot 100).

Related: Retired priest reinvents himself as gay adult film star at age 83, says he’s “having a party!”

After the band split, Coles followed a very different path, becoming ordained with the Church of England. He’s the vicar of Finedon, Northamptonshire. He has a show on BBC radio and also appeared as a contestant on the UK version of Dancing with the Stars (Strictly Come Dancing) – in 2017.

Reverends David and Richard Coles (Photo: Twitter)

In 2007 he met his partner, a fellow Church of England clergy, Rev. David Coles. The Church allows clergy to marry. However, it only permits clergy to enter same-sex civil unions if those involved vow to remain celibate (a contentious issue and one that LGBTQ advocates in the church continue to lobby against).

Sadly, Richard took to Twitter this week to announce David had died following a period of illness.

I’m very sorry to say that @RevDavidColes has died. He had been ill for a while. Thanks to the brilliant teams who looked after him at @KettGeneral. Funeral details to follow. “The Lord shall be thine everlasting light, and the days of thy mourning shall be ended”. pic.twitter.com/usvLDIBDv7

— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) December 17, 2019

He was immediately flooded with messages of support and condolences.

However, it appears not everyone feels the same sympathy.

Coles returned to Twitter yesterday to say: “99.99999% loveliness from people and then a small but lively correspondence from Christians who wish me to know that D is in hell and I will follow. It’s like the Khmer Rouge suddenly popping up in a stream of condolence.”

99.99999% loveliness from people and then a small but lively correspondence from Christians who wish me to know that D is in hell and I will follow. It’s like the Khmer Rouge suddenly popping up in a stream of condolence.

— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) December 19, 2019

He followed it up a few hours later with an example.

“A letter, courageously unsigned, begins: ‘Dear Mr Coles, I can’t begin to tell you how happy I am to hear of the death of your partner…’”

A letter, courageously unsigned, begins: “Dear Mr Coles, I can’t begin to tell you how happy I am to hear of the death of your partner…”

— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) December 19, 2019

News of the hate mail has prompted further messages of support. Coles has been quick to assure his followers that he is unaffected by the correspondence.

“The horrible letters: they don’t touch me. I am right now an expert in pain, the real kind, and these are paper darts among the incoming, and just leave me mildly curious about the state of mind of the writer.”

Related: Pope Francis receives an insight into LGBTQ lives from US priest

However, he has reported the messages to police, who are investigating them as potential hate crimes. Northamptonshire police confirmed to the BBC they had visited Coles, “in relation to malicious communications he had received.

“We take a zero-tolerance approach towards hate crime and would encourage anyone who has been a victim of hate crime to come forward and report it to us.”

Police called this evening, sympathetic and professional, and my hateful correspondence is now evidence. Thank you @NorthantsPolice

— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) December 20, 2019

Despite his obvious heartache, Coles says he has managed to smile and been touched by the support he has received.

“Bumped into a friend. We talked about D and how much we loved him and how good he was at sorting out those parts of my life in which I am deficient. Then she said, “you know, he’d never have let you out in that shirt and jumper”. First proper laugh since widowhood arrived.”

Bumped into a friend. We talked about D and how much we loved him and how good he was at sorting out those parts of my life in which I am deficient. Then she said, “you know, he’d never have let you out in that shirt and jumper”. First proper laugh since widowhood arrived.

— Richard Coles (@RevRichardColes) December 19, 2019

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WATCH: The beautiful way Adam Rippon marked his 30th birthday

WATCH: The beautiful way Adam Rippon marked his 30th birthday

Adam Rippon
Adam Rippon (Photo: @adaripp | Instagram)

How will you – or did you – celebrate hitting 30 years of age? Olympic medal-winning figure skater Adam Rippon hit that milestone yesterday. He decided to commemorate by shooting a video of him dancing a “birthday joy skate.”

He performs an awe-inspiring routine to Ben Platt’s cover of the Joni Mitchell song, “River”.

Explaining why he wanted to mark his birthday in this way, Rippon explained on Instagram.

“A birthday joy skate ??‍♂️ River by @bensplatt

“Today is my 30th birthday. I couldn’t be more grateful for everything and everyone in my life. Thank you for always sending love and positive energy my way. I hope I’m always able to do the same for you.

“I wanted to do something fun for myself so I asked one of my old skating choreographers, Cindy Stuart, to put this together with me. She is amazing. And Ben Platt is also amazing (duh) and when I heard him do a cover of this song I knew I had to skate to it. Huge thank you to @oniceperspectives who put this all together too ❤
HBD 2 ME. I LOVE YOU.”

Related: Adam Rippon announces retirement from skating in powerful letter

Rippon, who came out as gay in 2015, represented the US at the 2018 Winter Olympics in South Korea, where he won a Bronze Medal. His talent, engaging personality and all-round social media sassiness won him legions of fans.

After the Olympics, he went on to win season 26 of Dancing With The Stars with dance partner Jenna Johnson. He announced his retirement from competitive skating in November last year.

He recently saw his memoir, Beautiful on the Outside, published and is on a book tour across the US. He’s also co-hosting the Facebook Watch show Relationship Rehab with comedian Michelle Collins.

Happy birthday, Adam!

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Nate Silver Blasted After Scolding ‘Libs’ for Not Allowing Trump to Have ‘One Good Day’

Nate Silver Blasted After Scolding ‘Libs’ for Not Allowing Trump to Have ‘One Good Day’

Election statistician and prognosticator Nate Silver trended on Twitter Monday after complaining that “Libs” should let Donald Trump have at least “one good day.”

It really amazing how many Libs can’t even permit Trump to have *one good day* (nobody will remember this stuff by Tuesday) after US forces kill perhaps the world’s most wanted terrorist.

— Nate Silver (@NateSilver538) October 27, 2019

Tweeted Silver: “It really amazing how many Libs can’t even permit Trump to have *one good day* (nobody will remember this stuff by Tuesday) after US forces kill perhaps the world’s most wanted terrorist.”

Silver’s words weren’t welcomed:

I thought I’d wake up to a great day. Instead, I see @JoeNBC defending the white supremacist president, @facebook letting Ben Shapiro do what I was kicked off for doing, and Nate Silver lecturing us that we should let Trump have one good day.

Common theme: Privileged white men.

— Kimberley Johnson (@AuthorKimberley) October 28, 2019

Nate Silver’s trajectory from Stats Wunderkind to sneering memelord perfectly captures the libidinal dynamics of technocratic malice in the era of neoliberal decline don’t @ me

— Patrick Blanchfield (@PatBlanchfield) October 28, 2019

Yep, the “Libs” aren’t being fair to the guy who’s holding kids in cages, keeps conspiring with foreign nations against the U.S., is running sham criminal prosecutions of his enemies, and has sexually assaulted dozens of women. My statistical model says Nate Silver is unfollowed. t.co/IBfbO8To3b

— Palmer Report (@PalmerReport) October 28, 2019

Another great side effect of the chant. It triggered idiots like Nate Silver and expose their bias not by opposing the chant itself but by their use of trigger words like “libs”. Nobody cool uses that term to refer to liberals and worse yet it wasn’t just liberals booing. t.co/jrOntNMzvE

— Jon Royce (@zakkscoffee) October 28, 2019

nate silver is a walking pancreatic tumor. pic.twitter.com/Q2b6HMlH2f

— Badass Wolf Tiger Leather Bracelet (@larsloving) October 28, 2019

Nate Silver begging for him to get “one good day” is like asking me to have sympathy for a guy who broke in my house and pissed on my floor. t.co/8w2kl9wOOL

— Dave Schilling (@dave_schilling) October 28, 2019

Good to know who Nate Silver really is. t.co/Bdx4K577EI

— Adam Parkhomenko (@AdamParkhomenko) October 28, 2019

Nate Silver is getting ratioed into oblivion because of this tweet. Remember when many (including me) regarded him as the go-to regarding political polling? Thoughts and prayers or whatever. pic.twitter.com/4W3psyWbZf

— April (@ReignOfApril) October 28, 2019

The post Nate Silver Blasted After Scolding ‘Libs’ for Not Allowing Trump to Have ‘One Good Day’ appeared first on Towleroad Gay News.


Nate Silver Blasted After Scolding ‘Libs’ for Not Allowing Trump to Have ‘One Good Day’

‘By the Grace of God’ director Francois Ozon on Catholic sex abuse: “They are…in the Middle Ages”

‘By the Grace of God’ director Francois Ozon on Catholic sex abuse: “They are…in the Middle Ages”

Director Francois Ozon

Francois Ozon has all the charms of a true French gentleman: intellect, sensitivity, humor and grace. That’s a good thing: his latest film, By the Grace of God, required all his faculties. The story of French survivors of Catholic sex abuse, it’s now playing in select theatres in the US.

By the Grace of God recounts the true story of three men: Alexandre (Melvil Poupaud), Francois (Denis Ménochet) and Emmanuel (Swann Arlaud) who come together to expose the crimes of Father Priyat (Bernard Verley), the priest who abused them all as children. The film indicts the Catholic church on its complacency in the ongoing scandal, and on its constant maneuvering to equate pedophilia with homosexuality.

Spoiler alert: the two are not related.

With a resume that includes 19 feature films like Swimming Pool and In the House, Ozon ranks as one of the most prolific and acclaimed out-gay directors in the world. By the Grace of God also qualifies as his best film to date.

Queerty caught up with Francois Ozon to discuss the film, the scandals that inspired it, and the scandals it brought to its production. By the Grace of God is now playing in select theatres in the US.

Congratulations, Francois. The film is wonderful, and very moving.

Thank you.

What made you select this story as your film? How did you connect with it?

I never had in mind making a film about pedophilia in the church, you know? I just wanted to [do a film] to focus on men, on male fragility, on male sensitivity. I’ve made many films before about women, and this time I was able to make a film about men. So I was looking for a subject, and by chance, I discovered, on the internet, the testimony of some survivors. I was very moved. So I decided to meet with them, and they told me their stories. I made some research about what happened to them, and I thought it would be a great idea for a film. I wanted to make it a documentary at that time…

Ok.

But I realized they had made so many interviews before, they were tired. They wanted to turn the page. But when I met them, I was relieved. I realized they were waiting for a French spotlight from me. They knew I was a director of fiction, so I decided to make it [a dramatization].

Wonderful. Now pardon my asking, but were you raised Catholic?

Yes.

Ok, so obviously you have a personal connection there since you grew up in the church.

Yes, I know very well that world. But I lost my faith when I was a teenager. But I still have respect for the church.

Of course. So in the United States we’ve had several films—notably Spotlight, which won a Best Picture Oscar—that have confronted the sexual abuse scandal in the Catholic Church. The church, or certain Catholic groups, will often interfere with the making of or release of the film. I know you had an issue with that yourself…

Yes, the lawyers of the priest [Father Priyat] tried to stop the release of the film, because he was not judged. So they said the presumption of innocence had to protect him from the film. So they tried to stop it, but fortunately, the judge decided with this film the freedom of creation was more important than the presumption of innocence, especially because the priest never denied it. For 30 years, he told everybody he had a problem with kids. So everybody knew, and the judge considered it, but the film got to be released. So we learned that at the last moment: one day before the release.

That’s amazing. Now, when you were casting the film and hiring actors, was anyone reluctant—because of their religious beliefs—to take part in it? France is a very heavily Catholic country.

No, because I know no one who is for pedophilia.

Well that’s good.

[Laughter]

Though it was not easy to produce the film, because we decided to make it secretly. We did not communicate on the film. We lied to people who’d stop the shooting. We decided to change the title; it was not called By the Grace of God, it was called Alexandre. And I said to the press, it’s a film about friendship between three different men. So we were free to shoot as we wanted. The problems arrived after when the trailer was released and when people knew the real title of the film.

Wow. I’ve never heard of a director who had to work in that kind of secrecy to get the film made.

In France it’s possible. In Hollywood, I don’t think it’s possible.

There are few secrets in Hollywood, that is true. So, in one scene in the film Alexandre confronts a priest about the abuse, and the priest refuses to accept the word “pedophile” when discussing the behavior of the clergy. He also seems to want to lump pedophiles in with gay people. As a queer person—as I believe you are—this makes me very angry. But it also is a bit confusing. I do not understand why or how the church seems to think that abusing children is normal.

I think they are very confused, but things are changing. I think for a very long time, the hierarchy of the church considered pedophilia a sin like homosexuality, like abortion. They didn’t see a difference. They didn’t realize it was a crime. And there was this confusion between homosexuality and pedophilia because they didn’t understand homosexuality is a sexual orientation. Pedophilia is a crime. I think now that’s understood, but it took them a lot of time.

Ok.

When I made my investigation, I tried to find some survivors who were gay. I realized, because I asked many [survivors] if they knew anyone who came out as gay after [being abused]. Very often, they said to me “You know what? They committed suicide because it was so difficult for them to accept their sexuality after what happened to them as a child.”

Oh my goodness. That’s horrible. So why has it taken the church so long to understand?

I think they made this confusion for a long time. I don’t really understand. I think they are like in the Middle Ages. They don’t live in the world today. I think, fortunately, the liberation of speech [in the church] changes things, and I think the movement teaches some new people to speak out. Society is moving on in a good way. People are able to speak out. You have to be brave, but now you know you can be supported by many people. So things are changing, and if the church wants to survive, they have to change too. If they don’t change, they will disappear. I think some of them know that.

Of course.

They need a revolution about sexuality, about social things, about many things. The problem is when you meet the bishops or the cardinal, they are very old people. You don’t make a revolution with old people.

[Laughter]

Support should be younger instead of 75 years old. And it’s paralyzed by the government of the Vatican.

The other big question is why the church doesn’t just defrock these priests. Why not? Why are they allowed to continue? This is something very common in the United States as well, and in South America. It seems to be everywhere. I think, for a lot of American Christians like myself, most of whom are protestant, it’s dumbfounding that these people are allowed to keep their jobs.

I don’t understand too. That’s why I decided to make the film. When I made my investigation, what I did uncover was that everybody knew about these priests. In certain years, they left these priests with children. It’s impossible to understand such a thing. So that’s why I decided to make the film, and I know it happens everywhere, all over the world.

One other subtle detail in the film is the way several other characters—parents, siblings—of the victims seem so reluctant to discuss the abuse. It’s “in the past” they say. They can’t understand why victims want justice, or to prevent the abuse from happening again. Where does that attitude come from?

Very often, the people around [the victims] feel guilty. The parents feel guilty because they did nothing. They were not able to protect their children. I think things are changing, and it’s a question of generations. I think now parents are able to listen to a child. For a very long time, the words of a child were not considered important. You didn’t believe the words of a child. Now it’s changing. I think parents today are able to teach children their bodies belong to them.

Right.

I was never told that when I was a child. We never spoke about sexuality. So, I think things are changing. I speak in the film about people of all generations. For siblings, it’s something else. I discovered very often the brother or sister can be jealous of the abused child because the parents try to protect them. So it’s very complex. When I did the research and did the interviews, I discovered many complex relationships between all these people. It’s not black and white, it’s very ambiguous.

Obviously this is a film with very heavy subjects, some very shocking details. What was the biggest shock to you in telling this story?

I think it was the discovery that child abuse is a ticking time bomb that damages everybody, all the family. I didn’t know that, so it was a surprise to add to the script.

So for you personally, when you deal with a subject this heavy, how do you keep going? How do you prevent yourself from getting so depressed that it hurts your work?

You know, the irony is very often you’re more depressed when you make a comedy than a drama.

Why is that?

When you make a comedy, if you are not able to laugh, if it’s not funny, it’s a disaster and you feel depressed. When you decide to make a drama about strong feelings, you are more confident in your work, especially if you have great actors. I think it is more difficult to make a comedy than a drama. With this film, I knew I had strong material and lots of emotions to develop the script and shooting. And I had very good actors with me. I had everyone involved with the film. So I felt very thankful. I felt strong during shooting. I was never depressed. I knew it was important to do, so I felt good.

That’s terrific. So what has the international reception been to the film? I know you won the Grand Jury Prize at the Berlin Film Festival, but what has the reaction been from audiences? In particular, Catholic audiences?

In France, the film was a huge success thanks to the publicity of the church since they tried to stop the release.

[Laughter]

Many Catholics came to see the film because they understood the film was respectful to their faith. It was an attack against the institution, not the faith. So many priests, many Catholics came to see the film, and I think it was very strong to see their reactions. The film was sold all over the world, especially in Catholic countries like Italy and Spain, in South America. So now we are waiting to see if it will change things. In France, it did change things: the priest was defrocked after of the release of the film, and Cardinal Barbarin was condemned. So it was a strong victory for the survivors.

That’s marvelous to hear. Now, in looking at your filmography, I noticed something. All your films are about people with secrets.

Yes.

What’s the allure for you?

I think I’m just interested in life, you know? Life as a fantasy, as imagination. Very often to support your life, you have to live in lies or live in fiction. As in this film, people decide not to lie anymore. You have to tell the truth. You have to be brave to speak out because it can be helpful for yourself, but it can destroy many things around you. I want to show that in film.

You’ve directed 19 feature films now, which is damn impressive. That’s more than some Hollywood directors will make in a career. And you’re still rather young!

Oh, I’m not so young. You can’t see me on the phone.

I’ve seen pictures. 51 is not very old. Do you ever rest? You just keep going. Where do you find your passion?

I love to make movies. It brings me a lot of pleasure. Many of my friends who are directors prefer to take time before they make a movie. I don’t. I like to shoot. I prefer it more than when I don’t shoot. It’s my way of surviving.

Last question then, Orson Welles used to say every artist should have that one work that when they meet God and ask to get into Heaven, they can say “Because I made this.”

Oh my God.

For you then, looking over your resume, what is that one work you would offer, that makes you proud?

That’s a difficult question. You know, once a film is shot, I turn the page very easily. If my films are like children, I’m a very bad father.

[Laughter]

So it’s not up to me. I think I would say to God “I’ve made many films. Choose one I’ve made.” For me it’s difficult to make a choice because I have some big link to each one. But I’m proud of all the work, not any one piece.

By the Grace of God is now playing in select cities.

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