What Evan Wolfson and Marriage Equality Have Done for the People Who Despise Them

What Evan Wolfson and Marriage Equality Have Done for the People Who Despise Them
At a moment when Marriage Equality has become national law, albeit by the slimmest of margins, (and, thank you Justice Kennedy), LGBTQI folk and our allies would be moronic not to realize how harrowing is this decision for millions who don’t share our belief in what is now deemed to be a Constitutionally guaranteed right. Revolted by their visualizations of what same-sex unions mean, and haunted by unreal notions, including that we will soon agitate for the freedom to marry dogs, they spin their wheels in an effort to comprehend what has happened to a country they thought they understood as one explicitly defined by the Bible.

In fact, what “the father of marriage equality” Evan Wolfson and his colleague, Mark Solomon, (among others who worked at Freedom to Marry) have done is to make the nation stronger. Though our adversaries don’t yet realize it, this transformation of consciousness will be perceived much in the same light as the 1919 law granting women the right to vote. Or the momentous Civil Rights — and Voting Rights — legislation which LBJ passed, thereby enfranchising African Americans. Both advances were epochal; both had been met with stout resistance; in both cases, the losing side bewailed the future of the United States, as previously received.

As previously received….

Therein lies their fallacy and the same blunder which opponents of Marriage Equality make today. For in these movements towards “a more perfect union” postulated by the Constitution, the Republic and its people make actual progress. In the process, of course, old givens are recycled; that which was known — a received wisdom, oftentimes never questioned — are subjected to new inquiry. It is the never-ending quality of regeneration at the heart of the American Experiment: our willingness to start over, to cast aside the unworthy or the unworkable and put our shoulders to the wheel in the service of a finer and more compassionate Whole. And this is the very essence of healthy democracy.

One side doesn’t necessarily have to degrade or shame the other for being tardy. As Lao Tze wrote 2500 years ago, “If one leads, another must follow.” It is the law of Nature; it’s also human nature — to grow and stretch, expand and put aside the archaic in favor of what meets the reality of the Present.

This is where we are as a People: in the Present.

The gift which Evan Wolfson, Mark Solomon and their colleagues at Freedom to Marry bestowed upon the nation is to help harness a huge and still-expanding recognition of humanness. And human diversity. In its way, it is as stunning an achievement as the Emancipation Proclamation or the Supreme Court decision in Brown vs. the Board of Education. As a civil people, we have the right to expect leaders to lead; legislators to legislate; and courts to rule. This is the usually difficult, oftentimes infuriating, way in which our system plays out. That some will bridle is to be expected. But, in due course, they certainly will come to appreciate that what makes us truly strong isn’t our weaponry. Our power — true power — lies in our character. Some may call it virtue. I do. But in leading us to this wider embrace of our own citizens, irrespective of superficial differences, the patriots who ushered this issue forward brought us into the moment, reminded us of whom, and what, we are and renewed our collective sense of Self.

They are heroes.

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Obama declaring National Equality Day? It’s not happening

Obama declaring National Equality Day? It’s not happening

It seems like a lovely idea but no, President Barack Obama has not declared 26 June to be National Equality Day.

The report quickly spread Monday (6 July) after USA Today and several LGBTI sites picked up a week old story from the satirical site National Report which also currently has a story posted claiming Donald Trump has been named goodwill ambassador to Mexico.

The false story quoted Obama as saying: ‘I will be urging congress to honor the LGBT community with a federal holiday, until then I will issue by executive order declaring June 26th, 2016 National Equality Day.’

The bogus story was quickly revealed as false by  the site Joe. My. God.

June 26 is the day last month when the US Supreme Court made same-sex legal in all 50 US states. It was also on that day two years earlier when the high court gutted the Defense of Marriage Act and allowed the overturning of California’s Proposition 8.

There is a Change.org petition touting a National Equality Day but it has so far failed to catch fire with less than 150 signatures as of Monday.

The post Obama declaring National Equality Day? It’s not happening appeared first on Gay Star News.

Greg Hernandez

www.gaystarnews.com/article/obama-declaring-national-equality-day-its-not-happening/

Three NFL Players Got Naked For ESPN Mag’s ‘Body Issue’ And Here Is The Video

Three NFL Players Got Naked For ESPN Mag’s ‘Body Issue’ And Here Is The Video

mag_body_Colts_landingpage_RW_288x216ESPN Magazine’s annual “Body Issue” is certainly delivering the goods for 2015. Earlier the magazine leaked photos of Stan Wawrinka flashing his baseline, and now they’ve released video of the photo shoot with three offensive linemen from the Indianapolis Colts — Jack Mewhort, Todd Herremans, and Anthony Castonzo — showing some serious thigh meat.

Posing in the Body Issue is a major accomplishment for athletes, as it features some of the biggest big-name professional sportsters showing off the muscles they earned after years of training. All the nakedness is certainly a thrill to see, but really the photos are a celebration of the physicality it takes to be at the top of your game; and because each athlete’s game is different, their bodies have achieved unique shapes for what they need. The results are refreshingly imperfect, unique, and dare we say it, sexy. Yeah we said it. Big, hairy menfolk getting nekkid with each other is sexy.

After watching the video below of The Three Bears flexing au naturel, revisit one of our favorites, the 2012 issue with New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski. Goodness, how those “tight end” jokes linger in a situation like this.

Dan Renzi

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News: Texas, Confederate Flag, Frank Ocean, Superman

News: Texas, Confederate Flag, Frank Ocean, Superman

invasion> Texans reportedly fear an Obama-led invasion (insert Michelle Obama SMH + eyeroll here).

> While gay marriage continues to win, is abortion losing? 

> Princess Charlotte of Cambridge was baptized Sunday. 

> Hugh Jackman’s wife won’t let him work with Angelina Jolie.

> South Carolina Senate votes again to remove the Confederate flag. Two votes down, one to go.

male-model-sasha-mbaye-photos-07022015-12-435x580> Male Model Monday: Sacha M’Baye.

> James Bond the musical?

> Work-unfriendly photos of queer couples in the bedroom. 

> A record 25.4 million viewers watched the Women’s World Cup Final. 

> And this may have been the best fan in the audience of said game. 

> President Obama aims to step up the fights against ISIS but won’t commit more American troops.

> Miguel has some fighting words for Frank Ocean. 

cage> Unearthed footage shows beefy Nicholas Cage trying on a sample Superman suit for a Tim Burton reboot that was never to be.

> Were these quotes said about desegregation or same-sex marriage?

> Is this real life secret society the key to unraveling True Detective season 2.

> Live updates on what’s happening with Greece’s debt crisis after 60% of the country voted to reject a bailout.

> Heath Ledger’s homophobic gay uncle inspired his Brokeback Mountain character.

> Meet Spencer Boldman and his abs. 

 

 

The post News: Texas, Confederate Flag, Frank Ocean, Superman appeared first on Towleroad.


Sean Mandell

News: Texas, Confederate Flag, Frank Ocean, Superman

Defending My Son Who Wears Skirts While Fighting Victim Blaming and Sexism

Defending My Son Who Wears Skirts While Fighting Victim Blaming and Sexism
My son is 4. When he was 2, he went through a phase of wearing pink pants to day care for about two weeks.

About four weeks before preschool ended for summer this year, he started wearing skirts, dresses and flowery shirts to school most days. I felt a little awkward about it for the first couple of days, but I didn’t have any good reason to stop it, and frankly, I had several good reasons to support it.

For one thing, it made the miserable drudgery of convincing him to get dressed for school bearable as summer vacation approached, seemingly at a snail’s pace. Our only hope of getting him to school on time was to let him wear ANYTHING that fit the school dress code. Every parent has heard the advice, “pick your battles.” Each item of clothing he chooses himself increases the likelihood that I’ll get a bite of vegetables in him at dinner, a reasonable bedtime and the car seat buckled without a scene.

The school responded to his wardrobe choices in exemplary fashion. As he went in, a teacher would ask him, “What are you going to say if someone asks you about your shirt/skirt/dress?” To which he would answer something along the lines of, “It is my concert shirt” or “It makes me happy.” The teacher would then say, “OK, that’s what you say if anyone asks you why you are wearing it!” In he would go, happy as a clam. Out he would come at the end of the day, having raised a few eyebrows and received lots of compliments, still happy as a clam. I was relieved. So I picked up a few items at a thrift store that fit him better (and may eventually be available to my younger child).

During the last week of school, my in-laws very generously offered to watch the kids so I could go out for dinner with friends. Upon my return, I faced a very unusual confrontation. It may not seem confrontational, but trust me, this is as confrontational as my in-laws get.

FIL: “So, what is with the skirts?”

Me: “Well, it is the path of least resistance right now. We would’ve been on time for school this morning if I had known he was willing to wear a skirt. Instead I spent an hour trying to get pants and shorts on him. I don’t know why he didn’t just ask for a skirt….”

MIL: “Do you think he prefers them?”

Me: “Well, you know, I do — especially when it is hot out like this, skirts are a lot more comfortable and cool. I mean, the Scots preferred them, too, right?”

FIL: “I just hope he isn’t getting teased too much at school.”

Me: “No, that isn’t a problem. I asked him the other night at dinner if anyone said anything about his dress. He said everyone loved it.”

FIL: “Mmm. I’m not sure how long that is gonna last.”

I’m no idiot. I know that school children can be merciless. However, even in this exceptionally civil conversation, I see a couple of concerning assumptions.

My son isn’t hurting anyone. For whatever reason, he is choosing to wear frills and frocks on occasion. Yet the assumption is that he will be teased for dressing “like a girl,” and that action should be taken to prevent this from happening. There is a simple phrase for this attitude: victim blaming. The implication is that my son, by wearing girls’ clothing, is “asking” to be teased; that he would be the perpetrator of his own [non-existent] torment; that he should conform to societal norms to avoid even the risk of bullying instead of society confronting bullying, in the event that it occurs. If it does occur, why not confront and educate the bully, rather than admonish the victim?

There is also a gender bias here. While girls are often judged for wearing just about anything — be it masculine, feminine, short or long — I think it is fair to say that societal norms favor girls wearing pants more than boys wearing skirts. Girls are permitted (if not encouraged) to emulate boys, while boys are shunned for emulating girls. This continues into adulthood, with serious ramifications for women, men and families. Women are encouraged to “lean in” to their work while child-rearing, but men receive little or no paternity leave and are learning to pass as workaholics so they can spend more time with family. The examples are endless, but suffice it to say that just as the opposite of science isn’t girl, the opposite of boy isn’t teacher, nurse, dancer or homemaker.

My son wore a a flowered shirt, frilly skirt and leg warmers on the last day of school. I am very proud of who he is and the many wonderful girls and women he may wish to emulate. I am proud of his school, which has accepted and embraced him completely thus far. And I am proud of myself for not caving to my in-laws.

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REVIEW: Hibagon – Sydenham, London

REVIEW: Hibagon – Sydenham, London

Sydenham is a part of south London that is not really known for its restaurant scene, so any new restaurant in this area is greeted with a bit of excitement by the locals.

Hibagon is a new Japanese restaurant. It’s a comprehensive menu that offers a bit of everything.

The staff were friendly and efficient, and the food was good – especially if you stick to the basics.

This isn’t the best Japanese restaurant in London, but it could very well be the best Japanese restaurant in Sydenham.

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The post REVIEW: Hibagon – Sydenham, London appeared first on Gay Star News.

Gareth Johnson

www.gaystarnews.com/article/review-hibagon-sydenham-london/

The Presbyterian Church Is Threatening To Divorce The Marriage Act If Gay People Win The Right To Wed

The Presbyterian Church Is Threatening To Divorce The Marriage Act If Gay People Win The Right To Wed

1436187663267This just in from the (increasingly overcrowded) Department of Idle Threats: The Presbyterian Church in Australia is claiming they’ll stop marrying anybody, at all, ever again, if same-sex marriage is legalized in the country.

So there.

John McClean, convenor of the Gospel, Society and Culture Committee of the NSW Presbyterian Church, isn’t threatening to set himself on fire or marry his own daughter, but he’d like you to believe he’d rather pull the plug on all this marriage business than see that right extended to gay Australians.

Related: Will the Presbyterian Church Finally Approve Sexually Active Gay Clergy?

In an opinion piece for The Sydney Morning Herald, McClean laments the fact that “most people do not think that sex is only for marriage, and the vast majority of couples in Australia who marry live together first.”

Yeah, this op-ed piece really blows the roof off.

He adds that “[m]any Australians are not convinced that marriage should be for life” and “[n]ow a significant section of the Australian population also want marriage redefined to include same-sex couples.”

He feels these three trends deviate so far from the traditional Christian view of marriage that the only thing left to do is throw in the towel and give up.

According to Pink News, McClean was asked why it was the prospect of same-sex marriage that led him to abruptly take such an extremo stance, and not, say, no-fault divorce or premarital sex. He limply replied that “he was not around in 1975 when no-fault divorce was introduced.” So… he’s just trying to make up for lost time.

Singing a veritable cantata of false notes, McClean claims: “Jesus’ view was that sex is for marriage, marriage is for life, and marriage is for a man and a woman… Many people don’t share any of the three key elements in Jesus’ definition.” So now, he claims, it’s time to withdraw from the Marriage Act altogeteher.

We’d say we don’t follow his logic, but there’s clearly no logic to try following.

Derek de Koff

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