Behind the Scenes of Janet Mock's Wedding in Paradise

Janet Mock, who has already set the bar high as a trans woman, bestselling author, television host and pop culture icon, raised that bar a few notches higher last week with a destination wedding in her native Hawaii.

Mock exchanged vows with her longtime love, photographer Aaron Tredwell, and shared her story exclusively with Brides.com with a personal essay. And thanks to her social media posts and those of her friends, fans can enjoy a look at how the happy couple celebrated in paradise during and in the days leading up to their magical day.

Mock tweeted a photograph of the betrothed upon their arrival in Hawaii, just before Halloween. 

 

In her essay on Brides.com, Mock recounted how she met Aaron in 2009, and how he proposed last December. “When I said yes, I had never been more certain about anything,” she wrote, stating she was sure their engagement would be short and their wedding would be small and held on the beach in her hometown of Oahu. But that’s where her certainties ended, she revealed: 

“I struggled to imagine what my wedding day would look like because I had never imagined that I would actually have a wedding. I grew up in a world where girls like myself rarely got the guy in the end, where partnership wasn’t readily accessible, safety wasn’t guaranteed, and love wasn’t part of the equation. I had no blueprint for happily ever after.”

 

Oh em gee! My flowers are here. Thanks @suvexpressions and @karisa_lehua! #aaronandjanet

A video posted by Janet Mock (@janetmock) on Nov 4, 2015 at 1:10pm PST

 

Mock, often heralded for her bravery in openly discussing her transition and her dogged advocacy for trans women of color, showed she isn’t afraid to post an Instagram picture of herself without makeup, as she and her fiancé enjoyed Hawaii before their big day. 

 

Lounging at the pool before the matrimony storm. #aaronandjanet

A photo posted by Janet Mock (@janetmock) on Nov 3, 2015 at 5:58pm PST

 

Mock wrote in her essay that she turned to her girlfriends Mai, Alicia, and Nicolette, for advice on planning a wedding:

“Pick a location, interview planners, set a budget, and, most important, make sure you and Aaron are on the same page about what you want. Then I began pinning and following Instagram accounts like @caratsandcake, @apracticalwedding, and @Brides for inspiration.”

 

This girl. Ride or die since 12 years old. #aaronandjanet #girlslikeus

A photo posted by Janet Mock (@janetmock) on Nov 7, 2015 at 3:08pm PST

 

Among her close friends invited to attend the small ceremony were fellow trans women Angelica Ross, Jen Richards and Geena Rocero. Ross and Richards joined Rocero for her series on Logo: Beautiful As I Want To Be, and Vanity Fair called Rocero “the model who inspired Caitlyn Jenner.”

 

 

Loving #aaronandjanet for bringing us all together @withlovemai @smartassjen pic.twitter.com/EUsD6mBXws

— Angelica Ross (@angelicaross) November 6, 2015

 

 

Ross, who is CEO of Trans Tech and a former showgirl, shared photos and video of her fabulous dress with her Twitter followers.

 

 

 

Feeling it in #Hawaii #AaronandJanet #GirlsLikeUs #MissRoss (thanks @christuttle for the slow-mo capture!)

A video posted by Miss Ross (@angelicaross) on Nov 5, 2015 at 8:47pm PST

 

 

And that dress didn’t slow her down one bit when it came time to catch the bouquet:

 

#Repost @rslobodan ・・・ Lol. One of my favorites. @angelicaross snatched that #bouquet. No other girl stood a chance! Still laughing about her #ninja moves. #aaronandjanet #drunkinlove #GirlsLikeUs

A photo posted by Miss Ross (@angelicaross) on Nov 7, 2015 at 3:52pm PST

 

 

Guess who caught @janetmock‘s bouquet??? #AaronandJanet #GirlsLikeUs pic.twitter.com/tOKvIQfUP0

— Angelica Ross (@angelicaross) November 6, 2015

 

 

In typical fashion, Ross posted there is a lesson to be drawn from her “touchdown dive” for those flowers:

My touchdown dive for @janetmock‘s bouquet should show you, NOTHING has ever been handed to me, I go hard for what I want in life! #MissRoss

— Angelica Ross (@angelicaross) November 7, 2015

Mock shared in her essay the calm that entered her mind as she and Aaron wed, and then wrote of the tears they shed together:

“Walking toward Aaron was the highlight of our wedding. All day I was managing details, texting with my planner, getting glam with my girls…then I saw my best friend, my partner, my everything and I just let all the details go. I was fully present, and so was he. Our synchronized “ugly cry” was the highlight of my wedding. Just the two of us, fully present in front of our people meant everything. It was a dream, an impossible dream come true.”

Cherish friendships that find you wholly invested in someone else’s moment, whose joy brings together pieces of your heart. #aaronandjanet

— Jen Richards (@SmartAssJen) November 6, 2015

Dawn Ennis

www.advocate.com/transgender/2015/11/09/behind-scenes-janet-mocks-wedding-paradise

Pregnant Woman Walking (and Other Mystifying Acts)

There’s no doubt about it: I’m ready to pop. The thought of, “Is she really in there?” has completely subsided and has been replaced with the inevitable juxtaposition of, “When the hell is she coming out?”

Within the span of a month, my wife and I have gone to a wedding, a funeral and now, soon, a birth — our own daughter. The circle of life is captivating and, I might add, a bit discombobulating. Take for instance what happened at the wedding. I thought I’d be nice and grab a glass of wine for my wife so that she could visit with our friends and their six-month-old daughter at our table. Had I realized the looks I’d receive on the walk back to my seat, I might have done it sooner! Mouths dropped open and eyes widened as a nine-month pregnant woman walked across the room from the bar with a heavy pour of white. Note to self: carry a cigarette in the other hand next time. The disapproval rating was higher than Trump’s hair in an Aqua Net windstorm.

A very similar occasion occurred the last time I walked up a very steep hill from my office to the OB. Not one, but two different men turned their heads as I walked by them. And when I smiled, they avoided eye contact. It was almost as though they were threatened by my outrageous audacity to maneuver a hill “in my condition.” Is a pregnant woman not supposed to walk? “Gee, I’m sorry, I left my personal mule at home for the day. I knew I forgot something!”

But I digress.

Call me crazy, but being pregnant isn’t an excuse to be lazy. In fact, if anything it’s done more to scoot me into the highest gear possible for preparation. And, for the record, I do understand that every pregnancy is different and every situation is unique in terms of being able to physically handle certain stressors, so let’s get that PC bullshit out of the way right now. But for those of us who have been cleared to entertain anything other than sheer bed rest, life doesn’t stop the moment you conceive.

I haven’t even met my daughter yet, but I am already her biggest fan. She is going to grow up in a world where women can helm their own companies and corporations; can utilize every facet and square inch of their brains to become scientists, engineers, biologists, entrepreneurs, entertainers and heads of state. She can also choose to be a stay-at-home mom, a writer, a fishmonger or any other profession she prefers — and isn’t that the beauty of it all?

Success comes with hard work and sacrifice. That hill I walk up once every week now to see the doctor is getting more steep with each passing day. That short walk I took to get my wife a glass of wine at the wedding might take me twice as long today as it did a few weeks ago. The Running Man dance I pulled off to showcase my desirable talents to friends might actually pop out a kid if I were to do it this morning. And that mule I proverbially left at home, well, there’s no way I’d ever be able to mount that thing now, so forget it.

The point is: the biggest limitations we encounter in life are those which we put in front of own selves. By getting out of our own way and attempting to do the impossible, well, it just might actually make the impossible possible. And all the passersby who look and taunt with their concerned eyes that judge, let them. There’s nothing to see here. Just a nine-month pregnant woman making her way in the world so that her daughter one day has all the opportunities afforded to every male counterpart she encounters. Call me a feminist; call me optimistic; call me overworked and underpaid, but I know one thing for sure: you will never get up that hill unless you take the first step.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

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Open Question: What do atheists think of street preacher got Banished from LGBT-Supporting St Ambrose U?

answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20151109164125AA6kQFi

Passion Pit Frontman Michael Angelakos Comes Out As Gay

Appearing on author Bret Easton Ellis’ podcast Monday, Passion Pit frontman Michael Angelakos spoke candidly about a number of difficult topics, from being diagnosed bipolar to struggling with authentic identity in the music industry. He also discussed his marriage and subsequent divorce last year, telling Ellis that he is, in fact, gay.

“It’s always been about putting it off in my head — not consciously,” the 28-year-old told Ellis. “I just wanted so badly to be straight, because I love her so much. I think that was one of the most painful things when we decided to separate.”

“Specifically with my sexuality, it was just, unlike bipolar, ‘Don’t get help. Don’t talk to anyone,’” he also said. “I lived in such a straight group of people. Not like anyone wasn’t going to be understanding, it was not the time…This was dudes in bands talking about girls. It was just so easy at the time to talk about girls. I just kept writing about them. It was like the music was then again informing … I was going through so many difficult issues with girls in general that when I started dating my wife she just quieted them so much so. She was such a good friend. It became kind of a non-issue.”

His discussion of sexuality begins around the 49-minute mark:

h/t: EW

Dan Tracer

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What To Watch On TV This Week: Marlon Brando In His Own Words; Spotlight On LGBT Elders

Check out our weekly guide to make sure you’re catching the big premieres, crucial episodes and the stuff you won’t admit you watch when no one’s looking.

— Hollywood legend Marlon Brando gets an intimate documentary treatment in Listen To Me Marlon, Saturday at 9 p.m. Eastern on Showtime. The film is mostly narrated by Brando himself via a collection of audio clips collected throughout the years.

More picks for TV this week below!

— Logo highlights the stories of six LGBT elders in Boston tonight in a new documentary, Gen Silent. The film explores the unique challenges facing LGBT elders facing discrimination, finding housing and seeking healthcare.

— It looks like we’ll finally get some intel on the dearly departed bathtub momma in this week’s episode of Scream Queens, titled “Mommie Dearest.” Or maybe we’ll get a hysterical rant on using wire hangers. Either way, it should be a wild hour Tuesday at 9 p.m. Eastern on Fox.

— Detective John Lowe (Wes Bentley) continues to unravel on American Horror Story: Hotel, Wednesday at 10 p.m. on FX. Waking up covered in blood still beats bedbugs, if you ask us.

— Get a glimpse of the next generation of great designers on Project Runway: Junior, premiering Thursday at 9 p.m. Eastern on Lifetime. The competition follows aspiring fashionistas ages 14-17 under the gentle guidance of Tim Gunn.

What are you watching this week on TV?

The post What To Watch On TV This Week: Marlon Brando In His Own Words; Spotlight On LGBT Elders appeared first on Towleroad.

Bobby Hankinson

What To Watch On TV This Week: Marlon Brando In His Own Words; Spotlight On LGBT Elders

Kentucky's New Gov. Will Amend Marriage Licenses to Suit Kim Davis

Kentucky’s new Republican governor is ready to accommodate antigay Rowan County clerk Kim Davis‘s request to keep her name off marriage licenses for same-sex couples. 

In fact, Governor-elect Matt Bevin plans to sign an executive order that will remove all clerks’ names from legal marriage licenses in Kentucky, reports Reuters.  

“One thing I will take care of right away is we will remove the names of the county clerks from the marriage form,” Bevin told reporters Friday at the state Capitol in Frankfort.

“That is going to be done,” Bevin continued, according to Louisville TV station WLKY. “The argument that that can’t be done is baloney — we’ve already changed those forms three times, for crying out loud.” 

Bevin, whose election last week makes him only the second Republican to lead Kentucky in the past 38 years, offers a sharp point of contrast to outgoing Gov. Steve Beshear, a Democrat who outright rejected pleas from Davis and her attorneys at the right-wing Liberty Counsel to remove Davis’s name from the marriage licenses of same-sex couples. Beshear and Davis are still locked in a legal battle stemming from Davis’s claims that the governor violated her religious freedom by ordering all county clerks to abide by the Supreme Court’s June ruling mandating nationwide marriage equality. 

After repeatedly defying a federal judge’s order that she perform the full duties of her elected position and issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, Davis was found in contempt of court and jailed for five days in early September.

Davis contends that her Christian beliefs make it impossible for her to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples, and she has thus far refused to sign her name to any such licenses. One of her deputy clerks has issued all marriage licenses to same-sex couples, as Davis has refused to sign off on them — bringing the legal validity of those licenses into question.  

But that won’t be an issue if Governor-elect Bevin makes good on his promise to change the format of Kentucky’s marriage licenses entirely. There’s little reason to believe Bevin won’t follow through, as he made his socially conservative attitudes a staple of his campaign. He has also pledged to roll back Kentucky’s Medicaid expansion, which the outgoing Democratic administration implemented as part of the state’s participation in the Affordable Care Act, also known as “Obamacare.” 

Bevin, a businessman who at the time was a long-shot candidate for governor, reportedly met with Davis the day she was released from jail. His support for Davis became so central to his candidacy that he even handed out postcards that described him as “the only candidate for governor that has stood up for traditional marriage and religious liberty,” according to The Washington Post.

Bevin won election with 53 percent of the vote, according to the Associated Press; he takes office on December 8.

Sunnivie Brydum

www.advocate.com/marriage-equality/2015/11/09/kentuckys-new-gov-will-amend-marriage-licenses-suit-kim-davis

50 Cent, Vivica A. Fox And The Absurdity Of Hip-Hop Homophobia

On a recent episode of “Watch What Happens Live,” Vivica A. Fox, set to play Cookie’s sister in an upcoming episode of “Empire,” was asked to weigh in on ex-boyfriend 50 Cent’s alleged comments about the show. The rapper reportedly reposted a blog which suggested the ratings for the FOX drama have dipped because of the “gay stuff,” ostensibly referring to the relationship between Jamal and his boyfriend Michael.  

“First of all, you know… pot calling the kettle black. That’s all I’m saying,” Fox responded.

When host Andy Cohen asked Fox (who dated 50 Cent in 2003) to unpack her statement — specifically the suggestion that the rapper is gay — she smiled and said, “He’s not. We had a great time. I mean, he just seems like he’s got something that’s not quite clear,” she said. She also referenced a magazine cover featuring 50 Cent and rapper Soulja Boy, adding that 50 looked like “a booty snatcher” in the photo.  

It wasn’t long before 50 Cent took a few shots at Fox on Twitter and Instagram, making fun of her looks and divulging intimate details about the former couple’s sex life. “Oh no!! Now she thinks I’m gay because I let her lick my ass,” wrote on his Instagram. “Wait, I didn’t want her to, she forced me, my hands were tied. 50 Shades of Grey.”

The whole saga, which has been playing out on social media to the glee of Black Twitter, is a perfect example of the absurdity of hip-hop homophobia. Now, it’s important to remember that homophobia is not exclusive to the hip-hop and black communities. The narrative that black people are somehow more homophobic than any other group is a false one. 

But the way that this homophobia manifests in hip-hop is still worth examining — and calling out. The feud has now sparked a debate within Black Twitter about “booty eating,” whether men who receive and like it should be suspected of being gay. On the one hand, the fact that black people and hip-hop lovers are discussing this is great. On the other, it’s unfortunate that a totally natural part of sex is under this kind of scrutiny.

The spectacle of this feud just detracts from the conversation that we actually should be having; why hip-hop figures (like Eminem, or Waka Flocka) still feel empowered to make publicly homophobic comments. 

There have been rumors about 50 Cent’s sexuality in the past, which Fox was very likely aware of when she made her comments on “Watch What Happens Live.” That 50 Cent felt the need to lash out at Fox via Instagram is disappointing, especially since his insistence that he was “forced” by Fox comes off as his way of assuring us all that his masculinity is still intact. 

Both 50 Cent and Fox’s comments and actions have been petty, but on a larger scale they’ve also been damaging to the dialogue surrounding black male sexuality.

Equally disappointing, though, are the comments Fox made about the rapper to begin with. Fox took the intimate relationship between herself and the rapper and weaponized it against him. She was responding to his homophobic comments about “Empire,” a show she is set to appear on later this season, a show whose creator is an openly gay man and a powerful player in Hollywood. But rather than simply saying “no comment,” or unpack why 50 Cent’s suggestion was problematic, she chose to retaliate by trying to “out” him.

Both 50 Cent and Fox’s comments and actions have been petty, but on a larger scale they’ve also been damaging to the dialogue surrounding black male sexuality.  Black masculinity is constantly threatened, undermined, and scrutinized, and comments like those made by Fox do nothing to push the conversation about how to be more inclusive of LGBT people in hip-hop forward. While she may have thought she was just throwing “shade,” what she was really doing was once again perpetuating a stereotype that we desperately need to get away from.  

Also on HuffPost:

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Open Question: I wish I was gay?
LGBT have it so much easier because they are loved. They show so many commercials just to promote them. I guess most people love LGBT people which is weird

answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20151109145220AADcvGg

#AM_Equality Tip Sheet: November 9, 2015

Bruni takes on transphobia; Mormon Church breaks silence on controversial new policy; Rhode Island to remove Medicaid exclusions for transgender patients; Mississippi Couples challenge state’s adoption ban; And more. 
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/am-equality-tip-sheet-november-9-2015?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

When Growing Old Makes You Invisible As A Gay Person

“LGBT seniors are going back into the closet because that fear is real. You just know when they don’t want you there,” says one elderly participant in a new documentary Gen Silent about the largely unreported issue of homophobic home care workers intimidating the people they should be assisting.

The show takes a hard look at aging in the gay community, where seniors are less likely to have children or close contact with family and in turn more likely to age alone.

Below, an exclusive clip from the show followed by the trailer, which airs November 9th on LOGO at 9 p.m. ET/PT:

Dan Tracer

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