The Freedom and Pathology of Risky Sex
Sometimes I talk to guys on Grindr (usually masculine, beautiful men) and they want me to find them in the dark of their apartment, seed them, and go. I can pull up Scruff right now and find at least a dozen men willing to bareback with me. Outsiders would be shocked to see how many men on gay apps use handles like “AssUp4Cum” and “RawPozTop” with such brazen honesty. In the gay world, an entire community is bringing back the gay 70s petri dish, complete with very vocal advocates for this reemerging lifestyle. While modern medicine has made most STIs treatable (antibiotics for syphillis), preventable (PrEP for HIV), or manageable (Valtrex for Herpes), I’m not ready to sign on to raw sex as the norm.

I see the need for raw sex as a manifestation of the self-hatred many gay men have. We are emotionally stunted as men and stigmatized as homos, and it is hard to love ourselves; so instead we do things that harm ourselves. I’m not a prude; I understand couples bareback, boys slip up, and we all make inebriated mistakes. I’ve gone to orgies, sex clubs, and had more hook ups than I can wrap my mind around; that being said, I don’t just let random dudes cum in my ass. I’m concerned for my brethren who embrace the hedonistic side of gay life in all it’s fucked-up rawness. Risky sex acts as an escape valve for these men, and I see men addicted to it like others are to alcohol or drugs.

These guys who fetishize being loaded with semen (or loading others) are in the game for the wrong reasons. There is so much about sex to enjoy–playfulness, physical sensations, mental titillations–while choosing to protect yourself and your community from venereal disease. I know it’s taboo to pathologize gay sex, but this emphasis on the rawness of sex seems to come from an unhealthy place deep inside the psyche. Do we have something to prove by putting ourselves in danger, or is this the only kind of sex that turns us on? I believe it’s worth discovering via talk therapy where these desires come from.

Gay men who repeatedly engage in risky activities, such as frequent bareback sex with several anonymous partners should seek therapy from their local gay health center. I’m not talking about coupled men who bareback, or the occasional “slip-up” that results in risky behavior. I’m talking about men who make it their business to bareback, and seem to relish situations that put them in risk. These guys need more than an HIV screening, free condoms, and access to PrEP. They need all that plus comprehensive mental healthcare to help overcome the cycle of self-destruction.

Many gay men’s health clinics often offer mental healthcare programs at low or no cost to the community, but I wonder if they fully reach the clients they should. A lot of the people think mental illness is something theatrical like schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. Problems like depression and anxiety can tremendously alter our behaviors, yet many people never admit they suffer from these quiet mental health problems. I believe if more gay people sought therapy, our community would be kinder to each other and smarter in the decisions we make.

www.huffingtonpost.com/matthew-terrell/the-freedom-and-pathology_b_6990098.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices

Major CA Foundation Joins RFRA Opposition

The chorus of opposition continues to grow in response to Indiana’s passage of its Religious Freedom Restoration Act (RFRA).
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/major-ca-foundation-joins-rfra-opposition?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

Are Gays On A Mission To Force Christians Into Liking Anal Sex And Bestiality?

Bad news, fellas. Pat Robertson’s onto us!

In his latest televised rant, 279-year-old Robertson cautioned 700 Club viewers that gay people are on a clandestine mission to force all Christians to embrace anal and oral sex and endorse sex with dogs.

“The gays…are gonna make you conform to them!” Robertson warned. “You’re gonna say you like anal sex, you like oral sex, you like bestiality! …Sooner or later you’re gonna have to conform your beliefs!”

“What’s so terrible about havin’ sex with animals?” Robertson continues. “Well, that’s what’s gonna come next! …It is a weird world we live in and, ladies and gentlemen, please note that your Christian beliefs are gonna be under assault at every single phase of your life!”

He also weighed in on the recent controversy involving a pizzeria in Indiana that vowed never to cater a gay wedding.

“Most gays, if they’re havin’ a wedding, don’t want pizzas,” Robertson said. “They want cake.”

We never thought we’d say this, but we have to agree with Pat on that one. No self-respecting gay couple would ever deign to serve pizza at their wedding!

See the nonsense for yourself in the video below:

Graham Gremore

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/sCcoFJadIaU/are-gays-on-a-mission-to-force-christians-into-liking-anal-sex-and-bestiality-20150403

Miley Cyrus Wants Tom Cotton to Get His Priorities Straight

After the Arkansas senator said gay Americans should be grateful they don’t live in Iran, the fierce LGBT ally let loose her Twitter legion.

read more

Sunnivie Brydum

www.advocate.com/politics/2015/04/03/miley-cyrus-wants-tom-cotton-get-his-priorities-straight

Funny Or Die Basically Nails Why Indiana's 'Religious Freedom' Law Is So Dumb
Jump on these deals while you can, straight people!

James Van Der Beek and Anna Camp are ready to sell you and all your Indiana loved ones some quality wares … as long as you’re straight. This Funny Or Die video about the Indiana Home Shopping Channel pretty much nails why Indiana’s recent “religious freedom” law is so absurd and discriminatory.

www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/03/funny-or-die-indiana-home-shopping_n_6999904.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices

North Dakota Paper Takes a Page from Indy Star; Calls Out Anti-LGBT Lawmakers on Front Page

The cover of yesterday’s Forum of Fargo-Moorhead made a bold statement for LGBT equality, featuring the photos of North Dakota House Representatives who voted against non-discrimination protections.
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/north-dakota-paper-takes-a-page-from-indy-star-calls-out-anti-lgbt-lawmaker?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

All Hell Breaks Loose After Gay Kentucky Teen Comes Out During Basketball Game

Kentucky high school basketball player Dalton Maldonado already wasn’t having the greatest day — his Betsy Layne High School team had just suffered a harsh defeat during a tournament. But he never could have anticipated the string of events that would come next.

As the players lined up to shake hands, he heard someone on the opposing team clearly say to him “Hey No. 3, I hear you’re a faggot.”

This kind of slur isn’t anything unusual among teenagers, but Dalton was already struggling with his sexuality. He’d told a few of his teammates he was gay, and just that week he’d come out to his parents. The comment pierced him, and he noticed many pairs of eyes fixed on him waiting for a response.

“Yeah baby, can I have your number?” he sharply shot back. “Put up a strong front,” he told himself. “Don’t let them know they hurt you.”

Once he was back in the locker room, though, his strong exterior gave way to the well of emotion. He broke down crying, and after his teammates tried to console him, told them, “I’m gay, I’m gay, okay?”

He hadn’t intended to come out this way, but the genie was out of the bottle. And while his team stepped up to offer support, an entirely different situation awaited him outside.

As Dalton’s team boarded the bus, the opposing team shouted “faggot,” egging him to come out and face them. Several players even followed the bus as it made its way back to the hotel — something his coach and tournament officials didn’t take lightly.

The team’s floor on their hotel was put on lockdown, but Dalton chose to finish out the tournament.

“If we would’ve went home it would’ve looked like I was ashamed of who I am, and I’m not ashamed of who I am. I can stand up for myself, and I had my teammates and coaches by my side. I knew we would be okay. God wouldn’t let anything happen to us. We had come three hours to a tournament and we were finally playing as a team and coming together,” he told Outsports.

They finished the tournament with police escorts, and Dalton felt it was important to share his story to help others in the same position.

“I feel like this can help other young athletes, help them come out. My freshman year I didn’t think I would ever come out. Now here I am telling the world.”

Dan Tracer

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/taVYu6VGPAo/all-hell-breaks-loose-after-gay-kentucky-teen-comes-out-during-basketball-game-20150403

After Indiana amends law, Minneapolis drops ban idea
Indiana’s “religious freedom” law had prompted other states and cities to ban official travel.

www.mprnews.org/story/2015/04/03/religious-freedom-mpls

Seize the Moment: Stop New Anti-LGBT Laws in Their Tracks and Replace Them with Real Protections for LGBT People
As the momentum builds toward a United States Supreme Court decision in favor of nationwide marriage equality, the LGBT community in recent weeks has faced an onslaught of proposed or newly enacted state laws aimed at encouraging government officials, businesses, individuals and other organizations to refuse to serve LGBT people. Some of these laws specifically identify LGBT people as their target; others appear neutral on their face but, in fact, are intended to discriminate against LGBT people, other minorities, and women. These recently passed laws deeply disturb us, but the opposition that businesses, local governments, and millions of Americans have given to these laws is truly heartening. This impassioned and broad based support for LGBT equality gives our community and the majority of Americans who support us the momentum and opportunity finally to demand that Congress and state legislatures across the country enact laws that protect LGBT people from discrimination in all aspects of our lives. We must seize the moment.

The circumstances surrounding Indiana Governor Mike Pence’s signing that state’s law and the events that unfolded thereafter have provided the nation telling evidence of the real intentions of those behind these types of legislation: political gain at the expense of LGBT people. Governor Pence, who has long opposed equality for LGBT people in areas such as employment protections, marriage, and military service, revealed again his lack of support for LGBT equality multiple times in his now infamous interview on ABC television’s This Week. When the Governor signed the bill, he surrounded himself with known leaders of statewide anti-LGBT groups.

The national political strategy behind many of these laws is not new and is an attempt to exercise political power by trying to instill unfounded fear that ensuring equality for LGBT Americans will somehow impinge on American’s freedom of religion. Frank Schubert and Jeff Flint, the campaign managers for the 2008 Yes on Proposition 8 campaign that took away same-sex couples’ freedom to marry in California, explained in a 2009 Politics Magazine article how this fear-based strategy was a key component of their campaign. Shubert and Flint stated that in developing the Yes on 8 campaign they “strongly believed that a campaign in favor of traditional marriage would not be enough to prevail” and that “passing Proposition 8 would depend on [their] ability to convince voters that same-sex marriage had broader implications for Californians and was not only about the two individuals involved in a committed gay relationship.” They reported they “probed long and hard in countless focus groups and surveys to explore reactions to a variety of consequences [their] issue experts identified.” Shubert and Flint came up with the message: “Tolerance is one thing; forced acceptance of something you personally oppose is a very different matter.” They focused on three areas to manipulate voters as to this imagined “conflict of rights,” one of which was “religious freedom.”

With nearly 60 percent of Americans supporting marriage equality according to a March 2015 Wall Street Journal/NBC News poll, many opponents of equality are attempting to fabricate a threat to religious freedom now, as Shubert and Flint did in California in 2008. For decades, opponents of equality have attempted to use whatever message and strategy they have found effective to raise money, to motivate their base, or to scare voters. These tactics are political at their core and shift over time as Americans come to reject each one of them.

The same type of strategy based on a fabricated threat to religious freedom is also being employed to undermine women’s lives. For example, laws of this type have already been used to enable some large businesses and organizations to impose their owners’ religious views regarding contraception on women employees’ medical decisions. Indeed, Indiana’s recently enacted law invites individuals, businesses, and other organizations to refuse to serve any person simply based on what the individual or business claims is their religious view. The law could subject women, LGBT people, and millions of other Americans to discrimination and exclusion from vital services.

The outpouring of outrage at recent laws passed in Indiana and other states reveal that a majority of Americans embrace LGBT equality and want a nation where people do not have the door slammed shut on them because of who they are or whom they love. An Indianapolis businessperson developed a sign for store windows that states “This Business Serves Everyone,” and the “We Serve Everyone” campaign has gone national since. A 2013 poll by Third Way and the Human Rights Campaign revealed that 69 percent of Americans believe business owners should not be allowed to refuse services to lesbian or gay people. Last year, pressure from a broad coalition of individuals and businesses who support equality forced conservative, then-Arizona Governor Jan Brewer to veto a similar bill in Arizona.

We as Americans from many diverse backgrounds must not let up now and insist that Congress and state legislatures across the country enact wide ranging protections for LGBT people. And we look to the United States Supreme Court in the marriage equality cases to be decided this June not only to rule in favor of the freedom to marry nationwide but to recognize full equality under the Constitution for LGBT Americans.

John Lewis and Stuart Gaffney, together for nearly three decades, were plaintiffs in the California case for equal marriage rights decided by the California Supreme Court in 2008. They are leaders in the nationwide grassroots organization Marriage Equality USA.

www.huffingtonpost.com/stuart-gaffney/seize-the-moment-stop-new_b_6994872.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices

Michigan Watches Indiana for More Than Basketball

Amidst the drama in Indiana yesterday, Michigan governor Rick Snyder told press that he would veto a stand-alone so-called Religious Freedom Restoration Act.
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/michigan-watches-indiana-for-more-than-basketball?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed