WATCH: Ben Carson Thinks President Can Ignore Courts on Marriage Equality
The retired surgeon running for president claims the chief executive doesn’t have to recognize judicial rulings — showing he lacks an understanding of the U.S. Constitution.
Dawn Ennis
The Mother's Day I Became a Gender Creative Kid's Champion
When the holiday just for moms rolls around, I can’t help but think of my first one in 1990. Harry was just six weeks old. Their* dad and I tucked them into a red baby carriage and walked through the spectacular tulip gardens at Milwaukee’s Boerner Botanical Gardens. That trip became a tradition.
Harry started making tulip-themed Mother’s Day cards for me in kindergarten. They were in third grade when I received a handmade coupon book written in Spanish, redeemable for three kisses (besos), a hug (abrazo) and a cleaning of the parakeets’ cage (never mind).
The Mother’s Day Harry was 12, they handed me a plain business envelope with M❤M written on the front. I unfolded a single sheet of white paper to find a typed poem titled “The Joy of Having a Mother.” I was blown away.
“You wrote me a poem?!”
“Well, you wanted one,” they said.
Harry had begun writing a lot of poetry, and I’d asked at the beginning of the school year if they’d write one for me.
“That’s true,” I replied, “but I didn’t know you’d actually do it. And I certainly didn’t think it would be about me.” I sat down to read, my eyes lingering on each phrase.
“The Joy of Having a Mother
In life we only get one,
One who could never be outdone,
Somebody who is there forever and always throughout eternity,
Somebody not tainted throughout modernity,
They are there to help you, and to guide your direction,
One who will never face you with rejection,
Cherish this someone,
This heroine,
This champion,
Cherish this someone, for who they are,
Whether you are near or far,
Because they will love you, you not another,
And that is the joy of having a mother…“
I wiped a wet streak from my face. I’d never felt more important as a mother than in that moment. In a few lines my child had articulated our unbreakable bond and brought clarity to my role as their mom. But it felt a bit strange; I’d never thought of myself as a heroine or champion before. What I seemed to recall most were the times I thought I’d failed them.
I still felt guilty about not letting them be Wendy from Peter Pan for Halloween when they were two. And I wanted a double do-over for not having learned my lesson when they were four years old and I wouldn’t buy the Pink Power Ranger costume, only the blue one. I wish I’d known then what I know now. Harry didn’t care what anyone else thought; it was I who cared. I didn’t want anyone making fun of my child or judging me as a woman who was somehow making her kid gay.
I know we all make mistakes, feel guilty, or wish we’d done a thing or two differently. But here’s what Harry taught me: Unconditional love and support have no expiration date. We can demonstrate what it means to cherish our children at any moment in the present, even if our own mothers didn’t have the resources to do the same for us.
I was struck recently by something dancer Jerel Maddox said on a recent episode of The Prancing Elites Project. There’s a scene we learn that dance-crew member Adrian’s mom has never seen her son perform. She’s been to her other son’s basketball games and her daughter’s recitals, but never been there for Adrian. “There’s absolutely nothing like a mother’s love and a mother’s support,” Jerel says in a private on-camera moment. “If Adrian’s mom doesn’t come to the competition, it will emotionally tear him up.”
I think it’s a mother’s job to encourage her child to find their passion. We’re also in their lives to defend and protect our kids and give them a strong sense of belonging. They need that from us. It’s how they learn the importance of self-love and self-acceptance, the attributes that lead them to become happy, healthy and emotionally secure adults.
These days Harry is my hero. They are true to themselves and still don’t care what anyone else thinks. They trust themselves and believe in their worthiness. And while Harry may not make cards or write poems for me on Mother’s Day anymore, they fill my world with indescribable joy. And once in awhile, for no reason at all, they’ll surprise me with a colorful bouquet of tulips.
*Author’s Note: My now-25-year-old child, who identifies as genderqueer, tells me they have no preferred gender pronoun. I like to use “they” to identify them as a person first, with gender coming second. Sometimes I mess up and say “he,” or “she” when they’re performing as Amber Alert. When I apologize they’ll say, “Mom, I really don’t care what you call me.”
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This piece first appeared on the Give a Damn Campaign and Julie’s personal blog, My Son Wears Heels. You can also find her on Facebook.
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Texas Committee Considers Legislation to Advance LGBT Equality
Today the Texas House Committee on Criminal Jurisprudence held a hearing on important legislation.
HRC.org
Shocking Footage Of Apparent Gay Bashing Captured In NYC’s Chelsea Neighborhood
You’d never expect for this kind of thing to go down in the very gay-friendly (if not gay dominant) Chelsea neighborhood in New York City, but at 11:10 pm on Tuesday, May 6th, a gay couple was viciously attacked inside of Dallas BBQ.
Jonathan Snipes, 32, says that he and his boyfriend, Ethan York-Adams, 25, were targeted specifically because they’re gay.
They were bashed over the head with a wooden chair, thrown to the ground and repeatedly kicked by two men shouting anti-gay slurs.
Warning: graphic video:
A video posted by Awesomepeneur (@isaamsharef) on May 5, 2015 at 8:29pm PDT
DNAinfo reports that Snipes accidentally knocked over a drink, which led to the two attackers taking notice of the couple.
“A table near us audibly started making pretty gross comments about the two of us like, ‘White faggots, spilling drinks,’” Snipes said.
“I don’t let anyone talk to me like that. I went over there and asked, ‘What did you say about us?’” he added.
That’s when things suddenly escalated. One of the two men stood up and started to get physical.
“I may be a mouthy broad, but I wasn’t going to take it to that level,” Snipes said.
Snipes said the men threw them to the ground, saying “Take that, faggot” as they kicked them. One of Snipes’ teeth was knocked loose, his head was bruised, and cartilage in his ear snapped.
The two attackers fled the restaurant while the couple awaited medical attention. No arrests have been made.
“We want this to go viral,” the couple’s friend Sarah Meyers told DNAinfo. “We need to find him. My friend could have been killed.”
An NYPD spokesman said an investigation is ongoing, but that the incident was not currently being investigated as a hate crime by the department’s Hate Crime Task Force.
Um, and why not??
Here is more video from the attack:
Dan Tracer
Adele Dressed Up As George Michael For Her Birthday: PHOTO
British song-bird Adele today shared a snap from her birthday celebrations where she got to dress up as her hero, who is apparently none other than fellow pop icon George Michael. Adele posted the picture of herself on Twitter with the caption, “Thank you for the birthday wishes I had a wonderful time! I was my hero x #gottahavefaith.”
Check out the full photo-booth style pic, AFTER THE JUMP…
Sean Mandell
www.towleroad.com/2015/05/adele-dressed-up-as-george-michael-for-her-birthday-photo.html
Trans Hawaiians Will No Longer Need to 'Prove' Their Surgeries to Change Birth Certificate
Easing requirements for updating legal identification has wide-ranging positive effects for trans people, in aspects of life such as housing and mental health, say advocates.
Mitch Kellaway
These Are The Things Women Carry To Protect Against Attackers
After a series of assaults in the area, University of Iowa senior Taylor Yocom and her classmates started talking about what women do to keep themselves safe. Women revealed the arsenals they carry every day, as female classmates pulled out respective weapons and lines of defense. None of the women were at all surprised by the number of rape whistles and cans of pepper spray in the room, but Yocom said the men were shocked.
After seeing the varying reactions between men and women, Yocom decided to create a photo series called “Guarded.” The series features women from the University of Iowa holding weapons they carry with them to ward off attackers, such as keys, rape whistles and mace.
Yocom describes these weapons on her website as “the physical manifestation of the realities that women have to face every day: the necessity to be ‘on guard’ in a society plagued by rape culture.”
“When someone looks at this series, I want them to see the sexual assault statistics as actual people affected, not simply a number,” Yocom told The Huffington Post. “Victim blaming is a reality that women face in all aspects of their lives. I want people to see the mace and rape whistles as a physical embodiment of that idea.”
While carrying these objects cannot guarantee women will avoid or stop an attack, they provide one line of defense against an all-too-likely scenario. Nearly one in four women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetimes.
“I want this to be the physical representation of how women deal with ‘she was asking for it’ and being blamed for drinking too much,” Yocom said.
Here are 13 images of women and their lines of defense from Yocom’s series “Guarded“:
Head over to Yocom’s website to see more of her work.
H/T BuzzFeed
— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
New HRC Guide Provides Crucial Advice On Prevention, Treatment, and Sexual Health
HRC guide, supported by Elton John AIDS Foundation, provides roadmap to understanding health and HIV, and has unique online “What Do I Do If…?” clickable Q&A feature.
HRC.org
Beer Bellies Are Now Officially Considered Sexy. You’re Welcome!
We’ve been saying it for a while now, but we’re glad to see others are finally taking notice. According to blogger Mackenzie Pearson, whose post Why Girls Love A Dad Bod went viral last week, beer bellies are officially in.
Related: PHOTOS: Forget The Six Pack, These Sexy Men With Bellies Leave Us Hungry For More
Pearson has coined the term “Dad Bod” which she describes as “a nice balance between a beer gut and working out.”
“The dad bod says, ‘I go to the gym occasionally, but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy eating eight slices of pizza at a time,’” she writes. “It’s not an overweight guy, but it isn’t one with washboard abs, either.”
In other words: Just your average guy.
Related: Science Confirms The Bigger The Belly, The Better The Lover
Pearson argues that women prefer this more down-t0-earth physique because it’s not at threatening as a set of bulging biceps and washboard abs, it’s comfortable to cuddle up to, and it’s honest because “we know what we are getting into when he’s got the same exact body type at the age of 22 that he’s going to have at 45.”
We would like to add that gay men prefer it for the same reasons. Also, we like having something to grab onto.
“While we all love a sculpted guy,” Pearson says, “there is just something about the dad bod that makes boys seem more human, natural, and attractive.”
What do you think? Do you find Dad Bods sexy? Take the poll below.
h/t: The Odyssey Online
Graham Gremore
Davey Wavey Interviews Gay Teen and His Straight Best Friend About Their Prom Date: VIDEO
By now you have likely seen the all too adorable promposal by a straight Las Vegas, Nevada teenager to his gay best friend that set the internet ablaze. What began as one friend asking another to the prom quickly exploded to become a viral sensation. The friends, Jacob Lescenski and Anthony Martinez, got to go on Ellen and had the picture of their promposal shared by other celebrities including Miley Cyrus and Ashton Kutcher. Teen Vogue even followed the duo around as they got styled and ready for their big night.
Davey Wavey was also on hand to cover the boys’ trip to prom and got a chance to sit down and chat with them afterwards about what it was like to become viral sensations and why they think so many people responded to their story.
RELATED POST: ‘Teen Vogue’ Documents Gay Teen And His Straight Best Friend On Their Hella Cute Prom Night
Asked whether he was worried whether people would think he is gay for taking Anthony to the prom, Jacob responded, “Being judged is not something I’m worried about. Because I know who I am and the people I care about know who I am and I don’t need to worry about what the other people think….For me I was just trying to make my best friend happy.”
The boys went on to share that their slow dance was the most memorable and most nerve-wracking part of their prom, with everyone forming a giant circle around them to watch and cheer them on.
Jacob and Anthony each have their own thoughts on the broader message behind all the attention they have garnered. Be sure to check them out, AFTER THE JUMP…
Sean Mandell
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