How not to invite someone over for a hookup via Grindr

As we approach Valentine’s Day, now seems as good a time as any to remind everyone to be kind and respectful to others online.

A Twitter user has prompted many comments after sharing a Grindr message he received. The man messaging him was inviting him over for sex. However, it was how the invitation was worded that has prompted raised eyebrows.

Danny Whitehead (@danielswhi) is based in Scunthorpe in England. On Sunday, the 35-year-old was hanging out with a friend in a hotel. They both received messages from the same guy on Grindr.

When Danny received a message, he responded, “Oh you were chatting to my friend I was staying with!! He showed me your photos!”

The message he received in return said, “Yeah I saw you on his Instagram page. You’re not really my type, I don’t like fat guys, but you’re nearby. I’m at the premier inn. Fancy a fuck?”

Danny was taken aback by the bluntness of the message. He went on to post, “It did get to me a bit. Ever since I was a kid I’ve had issues with my weight, but then last year I got on a health kick and lost 5 and a half stone [77lbs].

“So to have someone call me that brought back all my insecurities for a time… but I’m good now!”

Related: Man travels from London to Helsinki for Grindr hookup

He says he didn’t reply to the message and instead blocked the person.

“What the hell is wrong with people?” wondered fellow Twitter user @leewelshman.

“This screams “I really don’t like myself” on his part,” offered @JDEdge. “Don’t feel devalued or somehow inferior because this person, whom likely has a warped sense of decency, sent you a shitty message on a hookup app. You’re fab, stay fab.”

“I’ve been Grindr free now for 2 months. Thank you for reminding me EXACTLY why I need to stay clear from that hell hole of an app. Honestly, it’s not worth your time man, Grindr is where all the ultra muscle masculine inside homophobic gays live. The app is like a drug,” said @KyngLeo98.

“That’s just wrong on so many levels… also clearly he has poor taste with his choice of hotel, so f**k him! Actually don’t that’s what he wants,” said @UrbanMaleUK.

Danny told Queerty he only joined Grindr last June. Before this he’d been in a long-term relationship with someone since the age of 17.

“This message was the first where someone has said something nasty, most people have been very complimentary – along with the odd random picture of genitalia that makes me laugh. I actually enjoy the app mainly, as it entertains me with some of the stuff people say.”

Related: His super hot doctor just hit him up on Grindr… now what?!

Providing more background on the exchange, he said, “On Sunday my friend was working away in Nottingham and had a hotel, so I went over and we spent the night watching TV and drinking decaf tea (wild, I know!) and this guy started messaging him.

“He was really good looking and was trying to get my mate over to his room, and my mate said ‘No.’

“On Tuesday I woke up after night shift and the guy had messaged me asking if I had been at the hotel on Sunday because he recognized me from my mate’s Instagram. He sent a couple of photos of his face to which I replied [with the message in the Twitter image].

Talking about his weight loss and experiences on apps, Danny went on to say that as recently as August 2018, he weighed 18 stone [252 lbs]: “And for someone who is 5 foot 8, that’s way too much.

“I joined an inclusive rugby team in Hull near where I live, and that along with a proper diet helped my lose 5 and a half stone pretty quickly, and I’ve managed to keep that off mostly.

“When I was still that big, I wasn’t on the apps so I can’t say if my online experience would have changed. However, I know my confidence has grown massively since then and I am I big believer that personality and confidence are sexier than a great body.”

www.queerty.com/not-invite-someone-hookup-via-grindr-20200213?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+queerty2+%28Queerty%29

Trevor Noah Reacts to New Charges Against Jussie Smollett: ‘Black Pinocchio’ Needs ‘White-Lady Nickname’

Daily Show host Trevor Noah made light of the latest developments in the Jussie Smollett case on Wednesday night, referring to the former Empire actor as “black Pinochhio” and saying he needs a “white-lady nickname.”

Smollett was indicted Tuesday on six new counts of disorderly conduct for allegedly lying to police about being the victim of a racist and anti-gay hate crime last January.

“Yes, Jussie Smollett is back in the headlines, this time for being indicted for reporting a fake hate crime,” Noah said. “And it really sounds bad, until you remember that his plan all along was to get a recurring [Empire] storyline that doesn’t go away. This is what he wanted!

“And look, I know what Jussie did was wrong, but at the same time I kind of feel bad for him, because he gets into trouble now for calling in fake crimes, but those Permit Patties who made those bullshit calls to 911, they live their lives,” Noah added. “They just do their thing. Maybe that should be Jussie’s punishment: he should be forced to get a white-lady nickname. Everywhere he goes, people will be like, ‘Well, well, well, there goes Subway Smollett!’” 

In related news, the Chicago Tribune reports that Smollett’s attorneys are likely to seek dismissal of the new charges on grounds they amount to “double jeopardy.”

Watch the clip from The Daily Show below.

The post Trevor Noah Reacts to New Charges Against Jussie Smollett: ‘Black Pinocchio’ Needs ‘White-Lady Nickname’ appeared first on Towleroad Gay News.

Trevor Noah Reacts to New Charges Against Jussie Smollett: ‘Black Pinocchio’ Needs ‘White-Lady Nickname’

HRC Releases Coming Out Resource for Black LGBTQ People

Today, HRC released Coming Out: Living Authentically as Black LGBTQ People, a resource for members of the Black LGBTQ community. The launch of this valuable resource comes during Black History Month, a time when we recognize and celebrate the long history of Black leadership in the LGBTQ movement, including the ways in which Black LGBTQ and allied trailblazers have been and remain at the center of the fight for equality.

“For those of us who identify as Black and LGBTQ, coming out can present a variety of challenges, and this important resource serves as a guide as we navigate our very personal journeys to living authentically,” said HRC President Alphonso David. “Although we come from a wide range of cultural, regional and ethnic backgrounds, we often share similar experiences — and barriers — in coming out. But, as demonstrated time and time again by Black leaders who have always been at the front of the struggle for LGBTQ equality, we know how important it is to live as our true selves, and have our full stories told and contributions recognized.”

This HRC Foundation resource details the unique experiences of Black people when considering coming out, including grappling with faith traditions and teachings that may condemn or reject LGBTQ identities. The resource also details the ways in which Black culture and history are also inextricably tied to queer identities throughout history. The resource also discusses the ways in which Black LGBTQ people must contend with the realities of systemic racism and anti-Blackness that influence all facets of their daily lives — including their LGBTQ identities.

“For my transgender son and for each of us, coming out and living our full identities is a process that can’t be measured,” said HRC Foundation Board of Directors Co-Chair Jodie Patterson. “But as leaders of our families, parents need to be equipped with information, understanding and a language that fits the current time. For years I stumbled, trying to grasp fundamental facts about my own transgender son. I thought being black and trans was a super wicked problem. Now I understand it to be powerful. This is the exact guide I would write — years later with all the love and experience I’ve earned.”

The release of this guide comes just before the HRC Foundation’s seventh annual Time to THRIVE Conference kicks off on February 14 in Washington, D.C. Time to THRIVE is the HRC Foundation’s premier gathering for educators, counselors and other youth-serving professionals, bringing together these experts to discuss best practices for working with and caring for LGBTQ youth and their families in schools, community centers, health care settings and beyond. The Conference also features HRC’s Youth Ambassadors, who represent the HRC Foundation by using their voices and experiences to raise awareness about the most pressing concerns facing LGBTQ youth and HRC’s programs that promote well-being for LGBTQ youth.

“When I was coming out, I didn’t have a guide to tell me that there was more than one way to be Black and queer,” said HRC Youth Ambassador Nakiya Lynch. “It’s important that Black LGBTQ youth know that they can be who they are without sacrificing either identity, and still be valid. I’m so glad they can have guidance that’s actually applicable to their experience!”

After coming out, some LGBTQ people report that they are able to better communicate with their family and friends, leading to stronger relationships and greater mutual understanding. While many Black LGBTQ people have similarities in their coming out journeys, no two coming out experiences are identical. This guide serves as a place to begin exploring the process.

www.hrc.org/blog/hrc-releases-coming-out-resource-for-black-lgbtq-people?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed