This year in pictures: Seven hot men of 2016

2016 was a trip we wouldn’t want to take again, but it certainly wasn’t without its perks. Let’s take a close look — and possibly even leer — at seven of the hottest men we found ourselves writing about time and time again this year, even if our conscience and several commentators told us to stop, stop, just stop.

Here’s seven bright spots on a particularly dismal year, in no particular order.

Pietro Boselli

Dubbed the “world’s hottest math teacher”, Boselli’s numerous shirtless photos — combined with his superior intellect and overall charisma — has made him an irresistible subject for any number of posts, and we obsessively follow him on social media to stay up to date on every Speedo change.

Sam Asghari

22-year-old model, physical trainer, and actor Sam Asghari first came to our attention playing a meaty construction worker in Fifth Harmony’s “Work From Home” video, a performance he followed up a few months later in Britney Spears’ video for “Slumber Party.” (He’d now rumored to be dating her.)

Tyler Clinton

Nephew of Hillary, the son of Bill’s half-brother Roger, Tyler Clinton is a recent graduate of Loyola Marymount University, where he gave the commencement speech. He’s also, as they to like say in The Oval Office, a major babe alert. 

He was also the subject of loads of modeling shots by Adina Doria, which you can see below.

Alex Bowen

No man is an island. But other parts of their anatomy sometimes deserve their very own zip code. This is certainly true of reality star Alex Bowen, a contestant on Love Island who first rose to our attention following a much-publicized photo leak that is on an entirely different level. We’ve already seen a plenty of this handsome guy, but we expect to see a lot more in the years to come.

Jeremy Meeks

If you saw him in a lineup, you’d say, “Officer, that’s him — the man who stole my heart.” And the precinct would collectively roll their eyes and wish you hadn’t come. In 2014, the Californian’s chiseled mug (by way of the above mugshot) went viral after Meeks was arrested on felony weapons charges. But this year he really came into his own, constantly replenishing his Instagram account — to remind you that some people deserves a second chance?

Related: PHOTOS: 16 Of The Hottest International Footballers Are About To Arrive In The U.S.

Proud to be a part of the @muzikconnect family. Thank you for this opportunity @jasonahardi

A photo posted by JEREMY MEEKS (@jmeeksofficial) on Dec 20, 2016 at 4:32pm PST

#dtla

A photo posted by JEREMY MEEKS (@jmeeksofficial) on Oct 11, 2016 at 4:55pm PDT

#california

A photo posted by JEREMY MEEKS (@jmeeksofficial) on Jul 8, 2016 at 11:28am PDT

Nyle DiMarco

Everyone’s favorite deaf, insultingly handsome model-dancer Nyle DiMarco is, in his own words, “Very single.” Talking to People magazine, the “sexually fluid” performer revealed “a relationship is not a priority of mine but, you know, I’m hoping soon enough!” And when DiMarco hopes, he hopes for all of us.

Related: Top Ten Hottest Opera Hunks Who Sing Us Love Songs In Our Dreams

Happy Thanksgiving everybody!! I’m thankful for every one of you my loyal fans who are also my friends. Your continued support everyday is the reason I am where I am. Lots of love to you all- ? Fact: We picked this 22 lbs turkey because it was Deaf. No I’m kidding ??

A photo posted by Nyle DiMarco (@nyledimarco) on Nov 24, 2016 at 8:04am PST

 

Beach for days, come and join!! ?: @thewaltersavage

A photo posted by Nyle DiMarco (@nyledimarco) on Aug 7, 2016 at 10:41am PDT

Keep your votes coming if you wanna see TARZAN with @petamurgatroyd next week on #DWTS ???? #DisneyWeek! VOTE ?? 1-800-868-3409 #RedefiningDance —– Photo for @official2xist campaign Phtographer: @marco_ovando

A photo posted by Nyle DiMarco (@nyledimarco) on Apr 4, 2016 at 2:52pm PDT

Franco Noreiga

Nothing to see here — just your standard mind-bogglingly hot model and restaurateur. The master chef often practices his trade without the hindrance of pants, thanks to the many years he clocked in as an underwear model. This explains why his Instagram account is so relentlessly prowlable. To whit:

SOUTHAMERICAN SUMMER #SOON ? @jeffsegenreich

A photo posted by Franco Noriega (@franconorhal) on Nov 21, 2016 at 10:44am PST

EDITORIAL #NYC ? @ruben_tomas

A photo posted by Franco Noriega (@franconorhal) on Jul 5, 2016 at 8:30am PDT

BEDROOM STORIES #NEWYORK #MICASA I’ve read all your comments! THANK YOU! Many #LAUGHS ???

A photo posted by Franco Noriega (@franconorhal) on Apr 5, 2016 at 8:13am PDT

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Republican lawmaker: Gays are ‘metaphorically’ like ISIS

Good news, homosexuals: you aren’t literally like ISIS, only metaphorically. That’s according to gibbering idiot, Colorado state representitive and talking pacifier Gordon Klingenschmitt, who has a radio show about Jesus and whatnot.

On a recent episode, Gordon complained about a stationary store in Arizona that was cited for violating nondiscrimination law. Then he talked about a report that ISIS fighters had murdered a gay man. And then he said they’re basically the same: religious police engaging in persecution.

This is, obviously, bonkers. Being told that you can’t have separate drinking fountains or that you can’t refuse to serve Jews or that you can’t turn away the gays is not the same as being thrown off of a roof. Sorry.

“We have religious police here in America that are doing the same, on a lesser scale, to the Christians here in America that the Islamic State is doing to the homosexuals in Syria,” he says. Nope, not even close. Those stationary store owners aren’t being punished for their beliefs! They’re free to believe whatever the hell they want! Go ahead and believe that gay people are gross, fine, go ahead, knock yourself out.

And in fact, if they wanted to extend that belief to their business practices, that would be fine too — if they were a private club, not open to the public. But the moment a business accommodates all members of the public, well, there are certain rules they have to follow. Religion doesn’t exempt you from having to wash your hands after using the bathroom, and it doesn’t exempt you from having to follow nondiscrimination laws.

Anyway, Gordon says that gays are “hiring religious police to metaphorically throw them off a roof.” No, not really. Bigoted business owners are walking off of roofs themselves, then complaining about the law of gravity.

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