Hundreds Turned Away From Only Session On Gays At Catholic Meeting

Hundreds Turned Away From Only Session On Gays At Catholic Meeting

PHILADELPHIA (RNS) Homosexuality was such a combustible topic at the World Meeting of Families, a four-day Catholic gathering under way here, that it was doused twice.

First, Philadelphia Archbishop Charles Chaput earlier this month barred LGBT Catholics from holding a workshop at a Catholic parish near the event. It moved to a local United Methodist Church instead and is operating simultaneously, but with vastly smaller numbers than the 17,000 people on hand for the main event at the Pennsylvania Convention Center.

Then, just as the single session on homosexuality at this Vatican-approved meeting of Catholic families was to begin on Thursday afternoon (Sept. 24), a conference official took the stage in the main hall, capable of seating at least 10,000, and announced the location had been moved.

Thousands of people got up and made their way up one floor to another room capable of seating only about 1,000. Hundreds of others were turned away, the doors shut on them by convention center officials citing fire code regulations.

Inside the session, it was standing room only, with some people sitting on the floors and in the aisles. All were silent as Ron Belgau, the sole openly gay man allowed to make a presentation here, took the microphone and, with his mother Beverley, described how he follows a “traditional Christian sexual ethic” that says homosexual activity is sinful.

“Some people have described me as the official face of gay celibate Catholics,” Belgau, 40, said from a small podium at the front of the room. “But the last thing I want after this session is people looking at me. Every parish has gay kids, every family has a member suffering with same-sex attraction. I hope that when you return to your parishes you will be able to accompany them in whatever struggles they face and speak up” against the stigma of same-sex attraction.

At that, the crowd broke into applause — something they did multiple times throughout the session. They seemed especially absorbed when Belgau’s mother, Beverley, took the podium and described her son’s coming out at age 21 as “the worst day of my life.”

“You may think the fact that he is celibate makes my life easier, and in some way it does,” she said. “But to be attracted to the same sex and publicly celibate in a sexually free society is no easy road to walk.”

World Meeting of Families organizers were not immediately available to answers questions about the last-minute move to another room.

But for members of Equally Blessed, a coalition of several groups supportive of LGBT Catholics who are not celibate, the move was an echo of the earlier rebuffs.

“We are just trying to understand and give them the benefit of the doubt,” said Ryan Hoffmann, director of communications for Call to Action, one of the groups in Equally Blessed.

Hoffmann was there with several members of Equally Blessed. He characterized Ron Belgau’s appearance as “generous,” “sincere” and “courageous.”

But he added: “The frustration is that he didn’t speak to the many expressions of love LGBT Catholics and their families experience every day.”

Still, he said, the fact that so many were turned away is a positive sign.

“This just speaks to the fact that people want to talk about LGBT Catholics and their relationship with the Catholic Church,” Hoffmann said.

 

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Reed Morano will direct Ellen Page in lesbian military drama Lioness

Reed Morano will direct Ellen Page in lesbian military drama Lioness

American cinematographer turned director Reed Morano has been named as the director of the upcoming Ellen Page movie Lioness.

Lioness will tell the true story of US Marines Lance Corporal Leslie Martz and her deployment to Iraq, and Afghanistan where she gathered intelligence about Taliban rebels by befriending their wives.

Martz was appointed to lead a Female Engagement Team during her Afghan deployment which aimed to foster women’s rights in the country and build bridges between US military personnel and Afghanistan’s women and girls.

However Martz was in the closet to her bosses to avoid being fired under ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ and began to find herself torn between her desire to impress her superiors while remaining loyal to the Afghan woman and children she had come to see as friends.

Morano has not directed a major LGBTI themed film before. However she has worked on a number of similarly themed films in recent years as cinematographer including 2013’s Kill Your Darlings, starring Daniel Radcliffe as beat poet Allen Ginsberg, and 2014’s The Skeleton Twins, starring Bill Hader as the gay half of a brother and sister pair of twins.

Page, who is openly lesbian, also portrayed a woman in a same-sex relationship in this year’s film Freeheld which tells the true story of New Jersey police detective Laurel Hester (played by Julianne More) and her battle to have her pension benefits transferred to her domestic partner after she is diagnosed with terminal cancer.

Lioness will begin filming in early 2016.

The post Reed Morano will direct Ellen Page in lesbian military drama Lioness appeared first on Gay Star News.

Andrew Potts

www.gaystarnews.com/article/reed-morano-will-direct-ellen-page-in-lesbian-military-drama-lioness/

PHOTOS: James Pianka Fills Out His Briefs In All The Right Ways

PHOTOS: James Pianka Fills Out His Briefs In All The Right Ways

James Pianka models six pairs of casual underwear in our exclusive photoshoot below, each with simple and effective designs that stun without ever trying too hard. These underwear styles are more modern than the common boxer brief, and will always provide a more flattering fit, thanks to their silhouettes.

Casual2

Casual3

Casual4

Casual5

Casual6

Photo Credit: Jerrad Matthew Exclusively for The Underwear Expert

Underwear Expert

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Tunisian student jailed for being gay after lover is murdered

Tunisian student jailed for being gay after lover is murdered

A young Tunisian man will spend a year in jail after confessing to having a same-sex relationship as a result of his telephone number turning up as part of a murder investigation.

The unnamed student was arrested on 6 September in the resort city of Sousse after his number was found on the body of a man he had been sleeping with.

He denied any involvement in the killing but confessed his relationship with the deceased to explain his connection to him.

Authorities believed his story after subjecting him to a medical examination but handed him over to prosecutors as a result of his confession and he was sentenced on Tuesday to a year in prison.

The maximum sentence for sex between men in Tunisia is three years in prison.

The Tunisian Association for the Support of Minorities has been calling on the government to repeal the country’s anti-sodomy laws and has accused it of using the law to intimidate the political opposition.

In 2013 the leader of the Liberal Party of Tunisia was convicted of having sex with a 20 year old man after they were allegedly witnessed having sex in a hotel spa room though many believed the charges were trumped up.

The post Tunisian student jailed for being gay after lover is murdered appeared first on Gay Star News.

Andrew Potts

www.gaystarnews.com/article/tunisian-student-jailed-for-being-gay-after-lover-is-murdered/

ReThink Review: Stonewall</em> – Don't Boycott It. Just Skip It

ReThink Review: Stonewall</em> – Don't Boycott It. Just Skip It
Controversy surrounding Roland Emmerich’s gay rights historical drama Stonewall started early when the trailer was released. In it, we see the film’s young hero, Danny (Jeremy Irvine), is the person who throws the fateful brick that shatters the window of Greenwich Village’s Mafia-run Stonewall gay bar, a moment that incited days of rioting that are widely credited as starting the gay pride movement and the battle for gay rights. While historians are not sure exactly who threw that first brick, the fact that Danny is a white, middle-class boy from Indiana drew the ire of several gay and transgender groups, who announced a boycott of the film since the trailer seemed to indicate that it would be yet another whitewashing of history, painting a handsome, white, straight-looking male as the savior while downplaying the pivotal role that lesbians, people of color, drag queens, and transgender people played in starting the riots. Watch the trailer for Stonewall below.

There are a lot of unanswered questions about the confluence of factors and people that ignited the crowd outside the Stonewall that night in June of 1969, including the identity of the brick thrower. And from some pieces I’ve read, the way that some queer groups attempt to answer these questions may have as much to do with historical accuracy as inter-group political battles and a desire to be respected and acknowledged for playing an important role in (or inciting/leading) arguably the most important moment in the history of gay rights.

As a non-gay, non-historian outsider who doesn’t know the competing narratives of this debate, I’ll punt on the competing theories of who might’ve thrown that brick and which (if any) group might’ve been more prominently in the lead that night. I also understand that fact-based movies often composite, condense, and utilize artistic license to serve the demands of cinematic storytelling, though I think Emmerich’s decision to have Danny be the brick thrower was as a bad one for reasons I’ll get into later. In general, I’m against the idea of boycotting any movie based on content that no one has seen, as was the case for the calls to boycott Stonewall based solely on a trailer.

While I sympathize with those calling for a boycott of Stonewall, I personally don’t support a boycott, especially since I don’t believe that Emmerich had any malicious intent. However, let me be clear: I don’t think ANYONE should see Stonewall. Not because of its politics or revisionism, but because Stonewall is a terrible movie. Like really, really terrible.

Stonewall fails in almost every aspect imaginable across its too-long 129-minute run time. The characters, writing, and dialogue have the same kind of realism, thoughtfulness, depth, and nuance found in Emmerich’s other films, like Independence Day, Godzilla, and The Day After Tomorrow. Danny, as a character, is incredibly bland, to the point that it’s unclear what Danny understands or thinks about his sexuality, which was widely considered at the time to be a mental disorder. Is he scared, ashamed, conflicted, defiant, proud, in denial, or is he simply afraid of how his homophobic, hard-ass football coach dad might react? However, we know for sure that Danny’s 14-year-old sister, Phoebe (Joey King), is 100% supportive of Danny being gay, even though Danny doesn’t seem totally sure of it himself and a kid Phoebe’s age in that era, location, and media landscape would’ve been incapable of even imagining an out gay person (there were no gay role models) or a world where being gay was anything other than something negative.

Once Danny arrives at Christopher Street in Greenwich Village, the group of gay street kids he falls in with have all the subtlety and relatability as a giant, fire-breathing, radioactive lizard. The kids are so one-dimensional (gayness/being fabulous being their sole dimension) that I was honestly surprised to learn after the movie that Emmerich himself is gay. In fact, the way most of the gay people in the film are portrayed (especially those over 30 years old, who are mostly depicted as suspect, pathetic, or outright repulsive), I imagined that Stonewall was made by well-meaning but naïve heterosexual men who had never met a gay person in their lives and spent the writing and shooting of the film telling each other, “I’ll bet this is what gay people are like.” And when a character does attempt to speak his truth, it’s only slightly less heavy-handed than a flying saucer blowing up the White House.

In fact, I’m hard-pressed to think of a single emotionally honest, moving, authentic moment in Stonewall, which is sadly impressive for a movie that’s supposed to be about the fight for human dignity and the right to love who you want, which should be universally understandable. Since we know so little about the characters, it’s hard to feel any sympathy for them. Jonathan Rhys Meyer’s character, Trevor, is a slightly older (therefore suspect) gay man who advocates a more conservative path to gay acceptance through legislation and convincing America that gay people are normal members of society. But instead of extending some sympathy to a character who, for good reason, is worried about a violent backlash against gay people if their movement is too loud, strident, and scary for average Americans, Trevor and those who share his beliefs are labeled as cowards who are “all talk”.

That’s because teenage Danny, who has lived a comfortable middle-class life in Indiana, has been on Christopher Street for less than a year, and has only nominally been out of the closet and a member of the gay community for less than that, is angrier and more fed up with the treatment of gays than the denizens of Christopher St. who have been living these indignities for years (including weekly raids and arrests at the Stonewall). As dumb an idea as that is, the film then proceeds to undercut it by showing that Danny’s true motivations aren’t gay rights, but sticking it to Trevor (who seduced Danny and quickly moved on to another) and his wimpy non-violent ways. And, more importantly, Danny discovers, in his words, “I like being mad”, which is supposed to be the culmination of Danny’s arc. Not that he sees himself and the world differently, or that he realizes something about the inherent value of a life lived with dignity. It’s that he likes being angry and violent, and in doing so, accidentally creates gay pride — or, as he screams (apropos of nothing), “Gay power!”

There are so many things both big and small that are wrong with Stonewall, from the Christopher Street set looking like something you’d find at an East Coast version of Disney’s California Adventure, the film’s failure to accurately depict how virulently anti-gay America was in the late 60s, to the fact that the film not only shows just the first night of rioting (there were several), but that it doesn’t bother to show how or why the riots changed the opinions of either straight or gay people. Who threw the first brick is really the least of the film’s problems.

As is usually the case with scripted movies based on actual events, documentaries about the subject are vastly superior. And in regards to the Stonewall riots, such a documentary already exists — the wonderful 2010 film Stonewall Uprising. Instead of boycotting Stonewall, just skip it and instead watch this great film featuring interviews with the people who were really there and can give the needed context of what America’s views on homosexuals were at the time, why the Stonewall and Christopher Street were so special and treasured by the gay people who hung out there, and how the riots went down and the lasting impression they left. Below is my review of Stonewall Uprising along with a discussion I had with Cenk Uygur of the Young Turks about the film, the history of America’s anti-gay laws, and how far we have and haven’t come.

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South Dakota to pay $242,000 in fees to lawyers, gay rights group

South Dakota to pay $242,000 in fees to lawyers, gay rights group

The US state of South Dakota on Friday agreed to pay US$242,000 to attorneys who challenged the state’s ban on same-sex marriages last year prior to the landmark decision by the US Supreme Court in June this year which allows same-sex couples to marry nationwide.

Attorney Josh Newville of Minneapolis-based firm Madia Law sued the state on behalf of six same-sex couples, challenging the state’s gay marriage ban and its refusal to recognize marriages of same-sex couples who had legally married in other states.

US District Court Judge Karen Schreier ruled in the couples’ favor in January, but put her decision on hold pending appeals.

A federal appeals court affirmed the court’s ruling in August which allowed attorneys to proceed with their plan to seek legal fees from the state.

Under federal law, attorneys in federal civil rights cases can petition a court to award them legal fees if a court finds in their favor.

According to the Argus Leader, about US$182,000 will go to Minneapolis firm Madia Law and about US$59,000 to the National Center for Lesbian Rights that provided additional legal counsel in the case.

The funds would likely come from the state’s extraordinary litigation fund and not from the attorney general’s office as the office isn’t responsible for paying for challenges to the state constitution or state laws, said Sara Rabern, the spokeswoman for Attorney General Marty Jackley.

Newville was quoted as saying, ‘What this case was really about was people’s rights and treating people equally.’

‘You can’t put a dollar amount on the indignity and the harm of not treating people equally,’ he said.

 

The post South Dakota to pay $242,000 in fees to lawyers, gay rights group appeared first on Gay Star News.

Sylvia Tan

www.gaystarnews.com/article/south-dakota-to-pay-242000-in-fees-to-lawyers-gay-rights-group/

Check In to This Scary Hotel With The Sexiest Guys Of American Horror Story

Check In to This Scary Hotel With The Sexiest Guys Of American Horror Story


For Season 5 of his television anthology of terror, Ryan Murphy books us a room at the murderous American Horror Story: Hotel.

Hotels are sexy — on the Strip, Grand, or by the hour — so this 13-part tale set in a 1930s L.A. art-deco brick pile called the Cortez is already turning us on. Add Matt Bomer and we’re calling down for a late check-out because he definitely likes to cuddle.

The Cortez begins life in 1930, built by psychotic and brunette Evan Peters to accommodate his mass-murdering habit; in the present day, Lady Gaga freshens the place up with some Arne Jacobsen egg chairs and a menu of ancient blood virus.

Along with shout-outs to Barton Fink, The Shining and those Cosmopolitan “just the right amount of wrong” ads, look for creepy blonde children, Darren Criss in a Silver Lake hipster cameo, and body-accommodating trash chutes. For serial-killing Peters, size matters. 

Look as well for more man-time in the latest installment. With muse Jessica Lange back on Broadway, Murphy makes Hotel his muskiest AHS yet.

Here’s a portrait in some exclusive portraits of the sexiest staff and guests, plus one drill-bit-dildo-wielding Addiction Demon.

American Horror Story: Hotel premieres Wednesday, October 7 at 10pm on FX.

Enjoy your stay…

1. Matt Bomer is Donovan

matt bomer

Pretty boy Bomer plays Gaga’s longtime lover, and both draw blood with some Daphne Guinness-inspired chain mail gloves. The handsome one will need his platelets when a younger and, if possible, prettier rival shows up. Kathy Bates works the front desk as Bomer’s mom.

kathy bates

2. Finn Wittrock is Tristan Duffy

finn wittrock

Hypersexual male model Tristan gets with Gaga at a Cortez fashion show. What about Matt?! Hello, blood-draining polyamory.

3. Evan Peters is James March

evan peters

Peters gets the hair to go with his noirish, mass-murdering March, modeled on H. H. Holmes AKA America’s First Serial Killer, who built a so-called Murder Castle at Chicago’s World’s Fair in 1893. Look for more serial killers like Aileen Wuornos and John Wayne Gacy at a dinner party in 2-part Halloween Devil’s Night.

4. Cheyenne Jackson is Will Drake

cheyenne jackson

You’ve already seen Jackson in one self-directed hotel production. This time, Liz Lemon’s dumb boyfriend plays a New York fashion designer looking for inspiration. Check Sarah Paulson’s room for heroin chic.

sarah paulson

5. Denis O’Hare is Liz Taylor

denis ohare

O’Hare tests your beer goggles as cross-dressing Liz Taylor, a fixture at the hotel bar.

6. Max Greenfield is Gabriel

max greenfield 3
The formerly-fat New Girl star plays a platinum blond Hollywood junkie, and apparently lost 30 more pounds for what Murphy describes as the series’ “most disturbing” scene yet.

7. Wes Bentley is Detective John Lowe

wes bentley 1Handsome Bentley moves into the Cortez on the trail of a Ten Commandments Killer. Wife Chloë Sevigny gets addled by harsh lighting.

chloe sevigny

8. The Addiction Demon

addiction demon

The Addiction Demon, first seen in an early and super-creepy teaser, has no eyes or mouth, but does wield a “nasty, conical drillbit dildo.” Call down for more batteries.

greg gillbergh

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25 Years of Bi Life

25 Years of Bi Life

Almost 25 years ago, we birthed a book. Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out was published in February 1991, and helped catalyze a new bisexual rights and liberation movement in the United States, a movement that linked up with others organizing similar coalitions in different countries, becoming international by the late ’90s. The book nurtured many generations of bisexuals, staying in print 25 years with an anniversary edition released during Bi Awareness Week, September 20-27, in e-book, as well as print.  

In some ways things have changed tremendously for the better for bisexuals since Bi Any Other Name brought over 70 different voices sharing their bi stories in essays, poems, cartoons, and photos with the public. And in some ways, nothing much has changed at all, except that we now have credible research results that puts numbers to what we knew existed — the shocking and depressing statistics that document the exact ways bisexual people are disproportionately stigmatized, discounted, and hurt.

Still, the children of today grow up in a different world than the one we elders entered. It is no longer as stigmatizing or as alienating and isolating to be bi, at least in some areas of the country sometimes. And there are some other encouraging social changes in the culture and the society as well. As we wrote for the new introduction for the 25th anniversary edition of Bi Any Other Name:

“How could we have imagined when we were teenagers that, in the new century, thousands of triumphantly out LGBTQ people would walk boldly through the front doors of the White House as invited guests at Stonewall Pride receptions and governmental meetings? As youth we had no idea what the first early organizing efforts for U.S. gay rights in the 40s, 50s and 60s would portend. We certainly didn’t know how dizzying the language changes, how culture-wide the debates, would become.

… Living both inside and outside the sexual and social [gender] paradigms, we bisexuals, queer people, polysexuals, fluid people, pansexuals, by every name we call ourselves — continue to subvert gender assumptions and explore naming ourselves — by every other identity, to no-identity-needed-or-wanted at all. This anthology has served as a coming out primer for generations of newly-out bisexuals of all ages, their families and friends. It catalyzed the U.S. bisexual rights and liberation movement and was heralded as a groundbreaking landmark. Called the Bi Bible, it became both organizing manual and reference book in classrooms, libraries, counseling centers, in pulpits and doctors’ offices.

… What’s most important is respecting each person’s self-identity and being recognized and understood for who we are.  Eventually perhaps the word bisexual will go the way of homosexual and fall from favor. Meanwhile we live and work with all the words we have. In the end, identity doesn’t matter to a heart in love.”

What’s encouraging is that in 18 years, Celebrate Bisexuality Day has grown from one day (September 23) to a whole week (September 20-27 this year) in the past few years, and that Celebrate Bisexuality Day/Week has sustained itself as a totally volunteer improvisational grassroots effort, so that there are now hundreds of events all over the country in big cities and little towns, on campuses and in independent bookstores, at conferences and other events.  What’s also heartening is that mainstream gay organizations like the Human Rights Campaign, GLAAD, the National Center for Lesbian Rights, and the National LGBTQ Task Force have all become more bi-conscious in the past two years. 

NCLR lit up with Twitter with history, education, and health facts that Evan Rachel Wood and many others are retweeting up a storm with this week. The Movement Advancement Project released a great new report and HRC launched a bisexual topics page in honor of bi awareness week. HRC’s September 17 release highlighted the heightened risk for health issues that bisexual adults face and urged everyone to close the knowledge and care gap for this half of the LGB population, a substantial portion of which also identify as transgender and gender fluid.

And Monday, the Obama administration hosted the first Bisexual Policy Roundtable, involving almost 100 local and national bi activists/leaders and a collection of federal officials from various agencies and departments. They engaged in active dialogue on a variety of policy recommendations that the Bisexual Leadership Roundtable, a coalition of national and local bisexual groups, worked developing the past few months. This was a historic occasion, the first policy roundtable on bisexual issues ever hosted by a U.S. presidential administration. Two years ago, on September 23, 2013, there was a preliminary event in Washington, D.C., hosted by the White House and held at the Executive Office Building, that was an off-the-record listening session between a smaller number of individuals. That meeting laid the groundwork for the one this week.

Bisexuals still suffer disproportionately. But the hate, the hurt, the misunderstanding, the suffering, the erasure, the callous disregard, the contempt, the discounting, the stigmatizing has not stopped. We have a lot of work to do.  

LANI KA’AHUMANU is often regarded as the strategic political architect of the U.S. bisexual movement. She has a 40+ year career instigating and mobilizing social justice actions, campaigns, street theater and cultural events while challenging bisexual invisibility and ignorance within the HIV/AIDS and health industries.

LORAINE HUTCHINS co-edited Bi Any Other Name with Lani Ka’ahumanu, co-founded BiNet USA: The National Bisexual Network and the Washington, D.C. group, AMBi, The Alliance of Multicultutural Bisexuals. She teaches inter-disciplinary sexuality courses at a community college near Washington, D.C.

Loraine Hutchins and Lani Ka’ahumanu

www.advocate.com/commentary/2015/9/25/25-years-bi-life

Kim Davis Gets An Award For Breaking The Law To Discriminate Against Gay People

Kim Davis Gets An Award For Breaking The Law To Discriminate Against Gay People

WASHINGTON — Kim Davis, the Kentucky county clerk who went to jail this month for refusing to follow the law and issue a marriage license to a gay couple, was given an award at Friday night’s conservative Values Voter Summit.

Tony Perkins, of the Family Research Council, presented Davis with a “Cost of Discipleship Award” that compared her with Martin Luther King Jr., Rosa Parks and Abraham Lincoln because, like them, she “pursued justice at great personal cost.”

“In today’s conflict over the meaning of the irreplaceable civil institution of marriage, one elected official, Kimberly Davis of Rowan County, Kentucky, has inspired millions of her fellow Americans,” Perkins said, reading aloud from her award. “As her words and actions attest, she has proceeded with an unshakeable blend of humility and determination. In doing so, she has reminded us we must remember to kneel before we dare stand.”

Davis got several standing ovations as she stood on stage. She cried each time, and received a bouquet of flowers as Perkins read the text of the award.

“I feel so very undeserving,” Davis said, choking up. “I want to start by thanking my lord and my savior Jesus Christ. Because without him, this would never have been possible. For he is my strength that carries me.”

Davis said she’s realized through the challenges in her life that Jesus will “show up at just the right time. His time is always perfect.”

She didn’t speak long. Her quivering voice turned to shouting by the end of her remarks, when she concluded with, “I am only one, but we are many!”

Davis left the stage to another standing ovation and, bizarrely, circus music. 

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Bisexual Visibility Week: Excerpt from 'Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out!' on the 25th Anniversary of Its Publication

Bisexual Visibility Week: Excerpt from 'Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out!' on the 25th Anniversary of Its Publication
“Out”line of one man’s polymorphic liberation — excerpt
By ben e factory (AKA Binyamin Biber)

Becoming conscious of my sexuality and finally coming out began with my involvement in religious youth activities: Summer camp, retreats and then conferences turned out to be hotbeds of hetero- and homo-eroticism with all of the multi-bunk rooms, open showers, hand-holding partner-switching folk dancing and those quiet wandering paths.

Topeka, Kansas, 1974, is, believe it or not, where and when I first touched another naked male and felt that sexual “thang.” A religious youth conference brought us to Topeka, where several of us somehow ended up in a gym or health club. There in a steamy steam room, I discovered myself leisurely lounging about with a few chums, all of us naked. We filled this little room with our contacts — visual, verbal and physical (shoulder to shoulder, rubbing elbows and knocking knees). This was the first time I was conscious of wanting to touch another boy in a sexual way.

At 14 I found myself signed up for Compulsory Heterosexual Monogamy 101: dating, kissing girls, then caressing and massaging their backs, breasts, legs and buttocks. I noticed compulsory heterosexuality caused me to become stiff. I began to develop my male character armor. Checking out Mom’s Playgirl magazines, I oozed desire for real emotional and sexual relations with other boys, something unavailable in this course.

Sweeeeet 16… mm-hmm. Right after graduating from high school, I smoked pot for the first time with my best friend, Andy, then felt relaxed enough to finally tell him that I loved him and would like to physically express my affection with him. He said he loved me too, but wasn’t into sex with guys. Frustrated in my unrequited love, but not feeling rejected, I went off to the University of Iowa. There I met Karen, who accepted my love and my “bisexuality” (I finally knew that Elton John and I were not alone in the world). Karen and I joined the Socialist Party USA and several other campus and community activist groups, learning more about heterosexism and liberation as we grew together.

The summer of 1978, I roomed with Bill, a friend from high school. He was the first male to accept my offer to share forbidden fruits. We continued off and on for a couple of years till he moved back to Kansas City. “Sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll,” we took a walk on the wild side and began to free ourselves from the domestication and colonization which caged and collared us. Being with him, I experienced a marvelous insight: We could really listen to each other, feel each other to be intimate equals and we began to see through our male conditioning. When Karen returned at the end of the summer, I heard her in a new way, as an equal with whom I struggled toward mutual liberation.

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