How to make your garden party a success

It’s the height of summer, the school holidays have started weeks ago and everyone is throwing party after party for family and friends.

Never out of fashion, garden parties can be everything: from being invited to the annual event in the gardens of Buckingham Palace to assembling all your friends for a night spent chatting away while the flames of your barbecue slowly die.

Whether it’s a posh affair or an informal gathering, everyone wants their garden party to be a success, so here are some tips – beyond the classic ‘provide enough drinks and string up some bunting’ – to make sure your party goes well.

Put up a marquee

Rain or shine, the Garden Igloo is made for every weather – even storms.

Unless you have a roofed terrace, putting up a small marquee has the potential to save your party: if it’s a hot day, your guests will appreciate the option to cool down in its shade.

If the heavens spontaneously decide to open (as they so often to in the UK), everyone can just huddle underneath – we’ve yet to encounter the party brought to a halt by a downpour.

For a more futuristic version, check out Greenbop’s Garden Igloo – priced at €599 (£423.46, $657.50), the stormproof igloo can be used all year round.

Have enough seats

Not just for parties: a simple, yet elegant bench is a nice addition to every garden.

Having to stand while trying to eat that nice steak you just got off the barbecue might not be the end of the world, but it makes for some awkward (and often mildly unattractive) attempts at table manners.

Providing enough seats doesn’t necessarily mean having everyone sitting around the table – benches, stools or beanbags are an easy way to have everyone sitting while easing up the atmosphere and getting people talking to each other.

The Victoria steel bench, available through QVC for £88 (€124.48, $136), adds some vintage elegance to your garden and will surely get your guests talking.

Crank up the comfort level

Rule of thumb: the more comfortable your guests are, the longer your party will last.

As warm as the days might be, summer nights can often get quite chilly, especially if all you’re doing is sit around, eat and drink – not to mention that sitting can get uncomfortable, too.

Beanbags or pillows are a nice alternative if your bum has gone numb from the chairs; scatter in a few throws, to keep not just the always-freezing friend (everyone has at least one – it might be a sign if you don’t) nice and toasty, and your party is set to continue into the wee hours.

Get a fire going

If you’re having a fire, don’t forget to roast some marshmallows.

No one can resist a bonfire, but just piling some wood onto your terrace to then set it aflame is something we wouldn’t recommend.

Fire baskets aren’t just much safer, some also add a nice, rustic feeling to any garden without taking the fun out of roasting marshmallows – like the one by German manufacturer Pro-Idee, clocking in at €395 (£279.24, $433.56); made from ceramic, it’ll also radiate heat for up to two hours after the embers have died.

Turn your garden into a cinema

Only one thing is better than going to the movies with your friends: having your own open-air movie night, with free reign over drinks and snacks and sans the annoying stranger sitting next to you.

Getting a big screen into a garden is easy – all you need are a sheet or a non-textured white wall as the screen, a laptop and a projector; span the sheet (strining it on a washing line usually does the job), arrange the projector and get comfortable.

You don’t even need to own a projector: simply rent one, either online or from a local electronics store – prices in London start from around £50 (€70.73, $77.63).

The post How to make your garden party a success appeared first on Gay Star News.

Stefanie Gerdes

www.gaystarnews.com/article/how-to-make-your-garden-party-a-success/

Periscope

HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/periscope?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

Rachel Maddow Rips Rick Santorum In Must-See Interview Showdown

Hey, guys, did you see The Rachel Maddow Show last night? If not, you missed a seriously, seriously epic showdown between the MSNBC host and GOP presidential hopeful/antigay activist Rick Santorum.

Not to worry. We are here with the recap: Lagging in the polls, Santorum agreed to sit down with Maddow. Everything started out just fine… until he suggested that Congress should pass a law overturning the Supreme Court ruling on marriage equality, saying that the Court “is not the superior branch of government,” thus giving Maddow a chance to lecture him on civics. Because, really Rick, the Supreme Court is the superior branch of the government, hence the word supreme. As Maddow pointed out, it “adjudicates” the law of the land, emphasis on “judicate.”

Santorum, a lawyer, apparently missed the lesson on Marbury v. Madison back when he was studying law at Penn State.

And that’s when things got wild. Fast.

“Do you believe people choose to be gay?” Maddow asked.

“I’ve never answered that question because I don’t really know the answer to it,” Santorum replied. “But I suspect that there’s all sorts of reasons that people end up the way they are.”

Then he said something positive about ex-gays to the lesbian host before launching into a bizarre hypothetical about why abortion must be made illegal to protect potentially gay fetuses.

Later, Maddow asked Santorum about the time he compared homosexuality to “the man-on-dog thing.”

“What I said was, ‘if people have the right to consensual activity, then they have the right to and I listed all these different things,’” Santorum explained, “and I’m just saying, that the court opened up a Pandora’s box.”

“You’re thinking bestiality?” Maddow asked.

By this point, it was clear the senator was getting uncomfortable. Meanwhile, Maddow appeared to be having the time of her life. And it only got better from there.

Watch the entire interview below. You’ll be so glad you did.

Graham Gremore

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/iaz4uBM5mQ0/rachel-maddow-rips-into-rick-santorum-in-must-see-interview-showdown-20150723

Thailand Isn’t Always the LGBT Paradise it Appears To Be. Just Ask These Gay Dads

Gay fathers Bud Lake and Manuel Santos with their child conceived by a surrogate mom in Thailand. They claim she sabotaged their custody process after realizing they’re a gay couple. (@twogaypapas on Twitter Screengrab)

By Patrick Winn

BANGKOK — When it comes to gay visitors, Thailand doesn’t flinch. Two men sharing a hotel room on a tropical isle? No problem. Foreign women strolling hand in hand? Fine.

For tourists, Thailand can feel like an oasis of gay acceptance in a world that’s often hostile to same-sex romance. This vibe is nurtured at the highest levels: the government actually runs a campaign called “Go Thai, Be Free” to attract spendy gay travelers.

But a dramatic case involving two gay dads — one American, one Spanish — highlights a less alluring reality: Thailand is not the LGBT paradise it often appears to be.

The two married fathers — Bud Lake and Manuel Santos — used a surrogacy agency to hire a Thai woman who agreed to carry their child. The baby is the product of Lake’s sperm and an anonymous donor’s eggs. (Prior to this arrangement, the couple and the Thai surrogate were strangers.)

In January, the couple traveled to Bangkok to await the child’s birth. It went smoothly and the surrogate mother, according to the men, signed much of the paperwork releasing the child into their care. The men named their baby Carmen.

t.co/t9UvbidqoV #HowWeFamily #bringcarmenhome @BringCarmenHome #lgbt @family_equality #gayparents pic.twitter.com/ycGcawi92z

— Twopapas (@twogaypapas) June 23, 2015

But the couple’s self-described nightmare kicked off when the woman explained to their lawyer “that we were not an ordinary family,” Lake told GlobalPost. “She doesn’t think two men can bring up a child.”

The surrogate mom has since refused to sign documents that would allow the child to leave Thailand and to fully relinquish her rights as the birth mother. “Emotionally, we’re just shocked,” Lake says.

The woman, who does not share the baby’s DNA, has appeared in disguise on Thai TV insisting that “I had no idea this was a gay couple” when she first signed on and saying that “the child was in my belly … so we have the same heart.” The custody dispute is unsettled and in a legal grey zone. So the couple is currently hiding in Bangkok with the infant as they battle for full legal custody.

The case may be surprising to those who see Thailand as a bastion of gay tolerance. In many ways, it is. But discrimination against gays in Southeast Asia’s Buddhist-centric mainland has a decidedly different flavor than US-style anti-gay prejudice.

Thailand’s attitude toward homosexuality is far less puritanical than those held by America’s religious fundamentalists, who believe gay life is a corrupting force on society.

In Thailand, gay is generally seen as OK. When the government floated a proposal in recent years to legitimize same-sex couplings, there was no great backlash. The nation simply shrugged. According to one poll, nearly 90 percent of Thais report having gay friends.

But as Lake and Santos have learned, the prejudice often doesn’t kick in until homosexuality enters the perceived sanctity of family life.

The notion of gay parents remains highly taboo in Southeast Asia. Society has yet to shake a deep-seated notion that homosexuality, while no grave sin, is still an imperfection. The superstitious may even regard it as a minor curse warranted by a past life’s misdeeds.

Even youth, often assumed to be enlightened on LGBT rights, report a surprisingly high level of anti-gay sentiment. In a recent poll of Thais aged 15- to 24-year-olds, more than one-quarter said they perceive homosexuality as “really wrong.” Another 29 percent considers it “not so terrible” but still wrong. (The rest, 44 percent, called homosexuality “not wrong at all.”)

Gay men are tolerated in Thai society, especially if they adhere to foppish stereotypes. Transgender women — so prominent in the world’s image of Thailand — are welcome too so long as they are garish entertainers or sexual playthings, not objects of serious romantic love.

But when it comes to family, many in Thailand do indeed flinch at homosexuality. The most recent polling suggests 60 percent of Thais have “no objection” to gay marriage while 35 percent oppose it.

Foreign tourists can take the government’s suggestion and “go free” with little fear of judgment. But gay men (foreign or otherwise) who try to become fathers will find that much of Thai society, deep down, believes they are unfit to raise a child.

Much of society, perhaps, but not all. “I still think Thai people are very loving and accepting,” Lake says. By the thousands, Thais have flooded the couple’s Facebook page to wish them well. “We’re hoping the media attention will help show more Thai people that two men can be wonderful parents.”

This article first appeared on GlobalPost.

The post Thailand Isn’t Always the LGBT Paradise it Appears To Be. Just Ask These Gay Dads appeared first on Towleroad.

GlobalPost

Thailand Isn’t Always the LGBT Paradise it Appears To Be. Just Ask These Gay Dads

Matt Bomer Won't Speak for Gay Community

Actor Matt Bomer schooled Hola Hollywood reporter Dulce Osuna after she asked him an insulting, steroetypical question about gay men.

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Bil Browning

www.advocate.com/media/2015/07/23/matt-bomer-wont-speak-gay-community

The Pedestal Problem

We celebrate megastars with a collective fandom that verges on idol worship. You could post a photo of Beyoncé, for example, showing up at an awards show (or eating a cupcake or taxidermy-ing a frog) with simply the word “Flawless” and instantly get favorites and likes. “Yaaas queen!” your followers might respond. “She’s SO brilliant!”

There’s this magical unity in that sense of community. In an Internet that is filled with trolls and sites that have subsections dedicated to hate, it’s a wonderful feeling to gather ’round and celebrate the beloved stuff. It’s almost the exact opposite of the Outrage Machine. We occasionally trade in the angry catharsis for a massive feel-good slumber party, where we all virtually braid each other’s hair and strangers tell us they think we’re really, really pretty.

And yet, as positive as that feeling can be, there is something going on with the stars we hoist up to the mantle.

Consider Amy Schumer, our most recent “queen” and “imaginary best friend,” near-simultaneously put on the pedestal and violently shoved off of it. As soon as the crowd started cheering loud enough, there was criticism that she was racist and not feminist enough (and, apparently, not respectful-of-Lucasfilm). There’s already a cycle of celebrating her then dragging her, as if she’s in some sort of sick eternal washer-dryer of public opinion.

There is a nuanced discussion to be had about the recent Schumer backlash. And, to be clear, this is not a covert defense of Taylor Swift — that Nicki Minaj tweet on Tuesday was some white feminist bull s**t. Still, something strange is going on when we automatically expect all of our (mostly female) idols to be not just awesome at whatever they are famous for, but to also be progressive icons and thought leaders. When did we start treating our stars as ideas? (Note that, duh, obviously, everything is terrible and of course male stars are not held up to the same standards.) 

This is certainly a mode of modern fandom. With the limited access, pre-tabloid culture, it was impossible to enact or even discuss these expectations with as much intensity and regularity. But social media has risen up as a sort of panopticon, watching (and generating think pieces about) every element of celebrities’ existence.

It’s at least strange that we now ask pop stars (or comedians or actresses or whatever) to fill a set of roles that it used to take a politician, religious leader, author, activist, expert, scientist, Nobel-prize winner and vegan chef to satisfy. This is a phenomenon that is clear not just in the realm of (often-valid) social justice shaming. It extends to everything we expect stars to represent. 

Jennifer Lawrence was accused of body-shaming because she talked about food too much. Mindy Kaling has been repeatedly accused of race blindness, despite being a prominent woman of color. Even the arguably flawless Beyoncé is criticized outside the realm of what we should expect from her as an artist. Her public endorsement of feminism is not enough, she has become a centerpiece for discussing sex positivity and intersectionality, a figurehead for the dialogue around the modern state of womanhood.

Across all levels of celebrity, it’s very much OK for people to ask public figures to NOT say and do awful things. It’s a different thing when a certain stratosphere of fame comes with the requirement of actively being amazing at articulating social justice issues. When we ask stars to weigh in on feminism or the confederate flag, we force them to take a stance. If they say they’d rather talk about their work, they are seen as weak or even bigoted. We demand them to be absolute champions and threaten to eviscerate them the moment they fail to be Nelson Mandela-level heroes.

Stars shouldn’t be beyond reproach, but we expect way too much of them and maybe need to consider outsourcing our role models beyond the red carpet. Art is not an automatic extension of activism. If someone is good at singing or dancing or dressing up and pretending to be another human being for 90 minutes, that’s really great. It doesn’t mean they’re going to be able to save us from the white supremacist patriarchy.

Middlebrow is a recap of the week in entertainment, celebrity and television news that provides a comprehensive look at the state of pop culture. From the rock bottom to highfalutin, Middlebrow is your accessible guidebook to the world of entertainment. Sign up to receive it in your inbox here

Follow Lauren Duca on Twitter: @laurenduca.

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48 hours in Berlin: from dusk till dawn x 2

Trust us: it’s the perfect time of year to take a mini-break to Berlin. This dynamic, one-of-a-kind and incredibly cheap city has a somewhat over-egged reputation for drizzly weather – and yes, of all months, June is the usually the wettest. But that’s only part of the story.

This European metropolis typically enjoys beautiful summers, with temperatures averaging 24°C; what’s more, last year was Germany’s hottest ever – and on 5 July this year, the country beat its own historic record, hitting 40.3 degrees.

Berlin truly comes alive during summer: parks, such as the sprawling, abandoned Tempelhof Airport, become populated with half naked sunbathers; dining and nightlife spill out onto the street, and sun-hungry locals hotfoot it to one of the many nearby lakes for a spot of wild swimming, such as Lake Tegel. Here, we ramble around Germany’s biggest city (population 3.42 million) on the hunt for cheap eats, stunning sights and unforgettable nights.

Don’t let Berghain’s foreboding appearance deter you…

Where should I party?

Dancing the night away at iconic super-club Berghain is a Berlin rite of passage – as is the experience of queuing up for hours to get in, while obsessively debating the infamously tricky door policy in a state of thinly-veiled panic.

During our visit, we also had a brilliantly fun night starting with beers at the cruisey-but-friendly gay saloons Hafen and TOM’s Bar, before heading to SchwuZ, a sprawling, cavernous dance party with a joyously mixed, non-judgmental crowd, where you’ll find pumping house playing in one room and Stevie Nicks’ Edge Of Seventeen in another.

We finished up in the hip after-hours bar Roses Bar, where Madonna was played on a loop and the walls are covered in pink fluff, making you feel cushioned inside a lady garden. Welcome to Berlin!

The abandoned Bierpinsel tower is typical of Berlin’s weird and wonderful architecture

What should I see?

If you’re on a budget, jump on a bike and survey some of Berlin’s bizarre, brutalist architecture (the Czech Embassy, The Bierpinsel, above); book yourself on a walking tour for a manageable introduction to its dense history (original walking tours also has a ‘queer walk’).  The extensive art collection of the Boros Collection, housed in a converted bunker also comes highly recommended, but booking is essential. For an essential photo op, visit the Brandenburg Gate.

The Brandenburg Gate, built in 1791, is another of Berlin’s most recognizable sights

Where should I eat?

Der Goldene Hahn is an excellent Italian boasting fine ingredients but a relaxed, informal vibe typical of Berlin eateries. Eating at the Asian fusion-focused Long March Canteen feels like more of an event. It boasts gold star service, Oriental ambiance, reasonably-priced dim sum, exceptionally fresh fish and wasabi so hot it it send a pregnant member of our party into labor (we’re serious).

For a cheaper eat, grab a burger to go at Burgermeister, where the epic concoctions are succulent and satisfying while being shockingly cheap.

A photo posted by Voo Store Berlin (@voostore) on Jun 9, 2015 at 5:38am PDT

Where should I shop?

Our favorite store in Berlin is easily Voo. As chain stores of its hipster ilk around the world become increasingly over-packed, pedestrian and unbearable, Voo is an oasis of calm, carefully-hand-picked style. There are few enough items on sale that you can rifle through just about everything before losing the will to live. Jumpers adorned with the glamorous face of Ursula from Disney’s The Little Mermaid, anyone?

Mary’s Lounge at the Axel Hotel Berlin

Where should I stay?

For ‘hetero-friendly’ boutique chic, head to Axel Hotel Berlin in Schöneberg; for upscale luxury and a central location, try the Hilton Berlin.

Gay Star News flew to Berlin from London with Ryanair. Fares from 24.99 for travel in September and October. Bookings available into July 2016. Ryanair offers three daily flights from Stansted to Berlin.

The post 48 hours in Berlin: from dusk till dawn x 2 appeared first on Gay Star News.

Jamie Tabberer

www.gaystarnews.com/article/48-hours-in-berlin-from-dusk-till-dawn-x-2/

Major Corporations Announce Support for Landmark Federal LGBT Non-Discrimination Legislation

In advance of this afternoon’s introduction of the historic Equality Act in Congress, today 3 major American companies announced their support for comprehensive federal non-discrimination legislation that would establish full, federal equality for all LGBT Americans.
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/major-corporations-announce-support-for-landmark-federal-lgbt-non-discrimin?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

Julianne Moore and Ellen Page Are Fighting for Love in Tearjerker First Trailer for ‘Freeheld’ – WATCH

The first trailer for the upcoming gay rights drama Freeheld has been released, chronicling the true story of a lesbian police officer with terminal cancer (Julianne Moore) who fights to ensure her partner (Ellen Page) has access to her pension benefits.

The Guardian adds:

It’s based on a short documentary film, also called Freeheld, and comes from director Peter Sollett, best known for Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist. The screenplay is written by Ron Nyswaner, who wrote the Oscar-nominated script for Philadelphia.

The film co-stars Steve Carell, Luke Grimes, and Michael Shannon and will be released October 2.

The post Julianne Moore and Ellen Page Are Fighting for Love in Tearjerker First Trailer for ‘Freeheld’ – WATCH appeared first on Towleroad.

Kyler Geoffroy

Julianne Moore and Ellen Page Are Fighting for Love in Tearjerker First Trailer for ‘Freeheld’ – WATCH

Op-ed: The Equality Act Is the LGBT Rights Bill We Want and Need

The executive director of the National Center for Transgender Equality breaks down the history-making LGBT Equality Act that’s being introduced in Congress.

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Mara Keisling

www.advocate.com/commentary/2015/07/23/op-ed-equality-act-lgbt-rights-bill-we-want-and-need